What a difference a night makes. Last night Marie faced off against Melanie Brown (aka Scary Spice) and indy car champ Helio Castroneves.
First the highlight of Marie's performance: Her impersonation of a live blow up doll to the Rolling Stones' "Start Me Up" during the freestyle competition was more than a jolt. It was a cultural moment. The image of Marie as a giant sex toy was a stunning repudiation of so many assumptions we've made about this woman for over 40 years. She's not the simpleminded good girl sitting at home crafting dolls for little old ladies and their granddaughters. She's a woman - and she's perfectly happy being manhandled by her younger partner, Jonathan. Post-feminism is back, courtesy of Marie.
As for her faith, she made it clear with this dance: She respects her religion, but her religion doesn't own her.
But while Marie's freestyle performance bordered on high art - expect to see the video of this performance playing on a loop in modern art galleries everywhere - it doesn't negate the fact that her opening Samba blew chunks. What's more, we saw the megalomaniac side of Marie when she bullied the judges for their less than sterling reviews. Haughtily proclaiming herself "one of the top doll designers in the world" did little for her much vaunted likability.
Even after her sex-drenched freestyle, she reminded viewers that she's a doll designer (WE KNOW!). The unflappable Tom Bergeron had had enough and tartly replied, "I think we all know that," before shooing her away.
Meanwhile Scary Mel fared only a little better - no thanks to her Spice Girl sisters in the front row. Her opening cha-cha was fine. But her freestyle performance was one long call girl infomercial. When the judges diplomatically pointed out that she was off the charts on the slutty scale, the Spice Girls in the audience turned into menacing soccer hooligans. Baby, Ginger and Sporty started booing and cursing. (Posh, aka Victoria Beckham, was too weak to boo, though she did manage to sit up - kind of.) Judge Carrie Ann Inaba seemed afraid that one of them might drag her onto the "pitch" and start kicking her in the stomach. Not an unreasonable fear.
Which brings us to Helio Castroneves. His opening jive (?) was exhilarating, even if the footwork was faulty. When the judges pointed this out, he accepted their criticism graciously. Then came his freestyle, a grand prix satire of race car driver bravado. The lifts were so great that judge Bruno Tonioli momentarily dropped the Roberto Benigni act (my neighbor tells me that Tonioli is actually from Jacksonville, Florida).
Helio has never performed professionally. Yet he's the best dancer - and, yes, the most likable. And probably the best role model for young competitors. He's got my vote! (Close observers also noticed that Leeza Gibbons smiled and applauded after Helio's performance. Until that moment she'd maintained strict neutrality - like a Supreme Court justice at a State of the Union address.)
***
Some Marie Osmond supporters have brought it to my attention that Helio is Brazilian and, as such, has an unfair advantage when it comes to dancing. Dancing is a major part of Brazilian life. (Brazil is also known for its sugar-based ethanol fuel.)
In fact dancing in the annual Carnival parade is compulsory for all Brazilians above the age of six. Indeed I'm hard pressed to name a clumsy Brazilian. They may not exist. (If you're acquainted with any clumsy Brazilians, please let us know in the comments section!)
Reader Comments ( Page 4 of 28)
46. Julieanne will win this competition. Helio doesn't deserve to win, but when Julieanne is dancing, no one notices her partner. If you isolated the dancing performances of the three remaining "stars" -- and showed them without their partners -- I think we'd all be amazed at how bad Helio is.
Eve at 2:54PM on Nov 27th 2007
47. I love DWTS and have been voting for Marie. I started to vote for her again last night, but got in only 1 vote due to the virtually constant busy signal. Once I saw her freestyle dance though, I was absolutely and very disappointed. I tried to give all the rest of my votes to Helio, but was again, only able to get 1 in due to the busy signal. My friends and I burned up our phone lines expressing our deep disappointment with Mel and Marie's performances. What were they thinking? Mel especially. They should have taken one of their best dances and beefed it up with lifts and other fancy moves. Instead they created "routines", not dances, that were boring.
Helio, as mentioned by others, had no prior experience, and has drastically improved. He deserves to win.
Sydney at 8:25PM on Nov 28th 2007
48. Mari's performance was week. She has done well throughout this competition, but she is not the best. My vote goes to Helio
Georgana LeVene at 2:50PM on Nov 27th 2007
49. Marie O. is a "big-mouth" know-it-all. She has an unjust haughty air about her, always coming off as an equal to the judges. Were it not for her "clan" -- do not think she still would be there. Big deal so she designs dolls. She is very dislikable. Never felt this way about her until seeing & hearing her up close & personal. She wore thin.
My vote goes to the lovable race car driver. He's a class act.
Signed -- "sick of marie"
mistkahl at 3:20PM on Nov 27th 2007
50. GO HELIO GO GO GO.......................
Dilene at 2:45PM on Nov 27th 2007
51. My vote goes to Mel. I believe that Marie should've been gone a month ago. Watching her dance is like watching the Gibbons woman dance. Slow and boring!! Helio has come a long way, and I have to say he has improved but I believe Mel will win.
As for those of you who will stop watching if your pick doesn't win, I don't think it will make much difference since this show, like American Idol, has a strong enough following and it only gets better. I doubt the producers will cry over the few 100 or so people who have bugs up their butts because their favorites didn't win.
Kristina at 2:45PM on Nov 27th 2007
52. Oddly enough, I didn't find her performance "sexy" at all. I found it "cutsie". I guess to some that means it's sexist and all about men. Oh well. I didn't see her as a sexy doll, more as a cute doll..... but then maybe I dont' have the same fetish as the author.
Honestly Marie isn't the best dancer in the show, but I'm appalled at the sudden negative publicity she's receiving since making it into the finals. Before this, she was a sweet woman who everyone loved. Now everyone hates her and thinks she's "Too sexy"????? excuse me? It's as though suddenly people realize she's in the top three and MIGHT win, and dang... can't have that happen!
Personally, on behalf of Marie (and of course I've never met the woman) I'm offended! There was no offense to her religion on that performance either! Geeze people - get a life!
TeresaR at 2:47PM on Nov 27th 2007
53. She was on par with Bette...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ck-Uo52MOg&feature=related
I was transfixed!
ah,clem at 2:47PM on Nov 27th 2007
54. Keith Fontaine, of course it's a popularity contest! Where have you been? If you invite the public, they will show up. People are voting for who they like best, not who is the best dancer. It's a fun show though.
shirley rasmussen at 2:53PM on Nov 27th 2007
55. I wonder where the mind of the writer was when he viewed Marie Osmond's 'doll character' as a blow up doll??? Ummmmmm?? The whole scenario was based on a toy doll, probably a Raggedy Ann type. It was a cute idea that didn't succeed.
My vote goes to Helio.
Nancy McEntee at 2:47PM on Nov 27th 2007
56. I just hope ABC isn't jaming the phone lines, I gave up after 45mins to get a vote in for Helio, same thing happened with Mario Lopez. I will always believe the lines were jammed to pick the choice of ABC.
Delma Wilson at 2:48PM on Nov 27th 2007
57. The phone was always busy when I tried to vote last night but I think Heleo was so far above everyone else there is no contest. If he doesn't win tonight something is rigged. By the way, the judges do a great job I think.
Carol at 2:50PM on Nov 27th 2007
58. Unfortunately "Dancing" has become a popularity contest with one of the least talented dancers, Marie, pulling in votes only because of her family, closeknit religion and viewers who care little about the best dancer and only care that their favorite person wins.
B Joan Thomas at 2:49PM on Nov 27th 2007
59. Mel and Marie are both stage entertainers. They know how to work the stage and over promote themselves...shut up already. Helio is new to the medium and thus has come a long way baby. He DESERVES to win.
Joyce Buckley at 2:55PM on Nov 27th 2007
60. Marie should have been disqualified long ago. She can possibly entertain, but she is NO dancer.
The Spice Girl earns the title SPICY time she dances and I love seeing her compete and wow us all each week. The driver is good, but he's No SPICE
Boy.
Jean Wyatt at 10:04PM on Nov 27th 2007