We've been haunted by the Megan Meier story for days now. If you missed it, here's the Strollerderby wrap-up: Megan Meier, a thirteen-year-old girl, met a sixteen-year-old boy named Josh on MySpace. He told her she was pretty and they had an online relationship. Then Josh abruptly told her he didn't want to be her friend anymore because he heard she was mean. He began posting bulletins: Megan is a slut. Megan is fat. Megan, who took medication for depression and ADHD, went upstairs to her room and hung herself. She died the next day.
Six weeks after Megan died, her parents learned that Josh was not a real person--he was created by the parents of a girl who lived down the street, a girl who had once been Megan's friend.
There are so many more awful details, many found in this St. Charles Journal article:
- Megan had been overweight and even though she'd slimmed down and started to feel pretty, but she was still deeply insecure and clinically depressed.
- When the Meiers found out "Josh" was in fact a fake profile created by their neighbors, Curt and Lori Drew, they took the foosball table they'd been storing for the couple in their garage, hacked it to bits, and left it on the Drews' lawn.
- Mrs. Meier was cooking dinner when her daughter hung herself upstairs; she blames herself. The couple is divorcing.
- The Drews are not being tried with any crime.
The most telling part of all this to us is that the Meiers did everything they were supposed to: monitoring their daughter's MySpace usage, prohibiting her from using the computer at times; trying to console her when her "boyfriend" broke up with her. And none of it worked, because just a few doors down were these monsters -- their friends! -- bent on emotionally destroying their vulnerable daughter.
There has to be something to charge the Drews with, right? Alas, it seems like as much as the police and the community would like to bring the law down on them, in this case there's just no such law.
Reader Comments ( Page 1 of 6)
1. The parents should be held equally responsible for the death of thier daughter. They knew full well of thier daughters mental history, yet allowed her to have an online "relationship" at the young age of 13? What 13 year old has a long lasting relationahip? Heartbreak and breakups are a given.
MySpace and similar sites are breeding grounds for perverts and stalkers. One has NO idea who is really behind the keyboard at the other end of the "relationship". Her parents should not have allowed her this type of internet activity.
What the Drews did was absolutely reprehensible, they would not have been able to reach the girl emotionally had the parents not allowed thier child MySpace internet access.
Mary at 9:10AM on Dec 4th 2007
2. This is a horrible situation. And I do not endorse what the Drew Family did at all, however, it appears that it Megan was already quite disturbed. Whether it had been the Drew Family or some other unfortunate event, Megan was headed for a crash. Unfortunately, the Drew Family stepped up to the plate at the wrong time. The reality is kids/teenagers can be brutal beings and they turn into brutal adults. Many of us learn to manage harsh words/deeds against us. I'd be curious to know why Megan was so depressed in the first place. Her parents seem to take no responsibility for her plight, stating that they did all they could to monitor her online activity. Although I did hear the Mother indicate that she was not very open to her moments prior to her suicide, but that's the only blame they seem to accept. I believe Megan needed help that she simply was not getting.
Teddy at 9:16AM on Dec 4th 2007
3. Blaming the parents is kinda like adding insult to injury at this point. Plus if they monitored their kid the perhaps a little romance, which every 13 year old wants to dabble in, could have really helped her self esteem.
I think the perpetrators are sick. What grown man and woman get their kicks harassing an emotionally delicate little girl? And their passing on their twisted sense of humor to their daughter. I remember after Columbine everyone was all for humane treatment of others, signing pacts and crap like that. Well that went out of style like last season's shoes.
Nox at 9:32AM on Dec 4th 2007
4. I agree that the Drew's, their daughter, and the dim-witted "friend" that joined in on destroying an already fragile girl should be held responsible in some way. Our laws are antiquated and need to catch-up to cyber-society that our forefathers didn't know about. At the very least, they should be banned from EVER owning a computer, and if caught on someone else's computer, they should go to jail. They are as guilty of her death as they would be had they hung her themselves. My heart goes out to the Meir family. Here is another scenario of society's influence on a young girl's self image and self worth. What's happening to this country?
Rosebud at 10:16AM on Dec 4th 2007
5. 13 years old and she had some problems. Maybe talking to the "boy" on the internet was helping her to feel better about herself and that is why her parents allowed it. 13 year olds are dealing with things we never dreamed of at that age. My 12 year old has 2 friend in her school (7th grade) that are pregnant. C'mon here. If this other mother was a friend of the family, there is no way she wasn't aware of the child's depression. There are absolutely laws that were broken. They just haven't ever been applied to a situation such as this one. I believe a definate example should be made. With knowledge this child's mental illness was used to cause her death. How is that any different from the laws that pertain to the mentally challenged? Besides a woman who finds amusement in torturing a child should have her own child taken away. Someone DO SOMETHING HERE!!!
Loweprophyle at 10:23AM on Dec 4th 2007
6. A civil suit in the making, for sure. The drews can run, they cannot hide.
The Dexter at 10:47AM on Dec 4th 2007
7. the reality of the situation is this girl was a screwed up person to begin with, it is unfortunate that the neigbors were in on this prank gone awry but this could have happened if there really was a Josh at the local middle school, people who commit suicide don't really deserve much respect in my book, they are weak people who lack the nessasary skills to cope with life plain and simple. what would have happened in high school where gossip and backbiting are common place? this was an eventuality that was bound to happen eventually. the fault of this situation lies soley on the girl who killed herself,whats next? locking up every ex-lover who ever has anything bad to say about thier ex? I agree that the neigbors are to blame for harrasment but not the suicide.
Joshua Morale at 11:04AM on Dec 4th 2007
8. This is the downside of the internet, folks...
David S. at 11:09AM on Dec 4th 2007
9. Another serious case of "Man's inhumanity to man" and yet, thankfully, I'm still stunned.
Jen at 11:31AM on Dec 4th 2007
10. This is not the fault of Megan's parents. They shouldn't be expected to keep their daughter from having friends, even if the friend was a boy. Blaming Megan is unfair. Her mental health issues were not her fault any more than if she'd had a physical illness.
The blame for this lies solely on the Drews. How anyone can be so cruel to a child is beyond me. They may not be criminally liable, but I hope that Megan's parents file a civil suit.
Tatiana at 11:40AM on Dec 4th 2007
11. It is completely ridiculous to blame her parents for her death. Can you watch your child every second of every day? Do you lock them in their room so nothing "bad" will ever happen to them? No, you give them boundaries, guidance and rules, and let them LIVE. At 13 many kids can stay home alone, go to the mall unchapperoned, etc. The parents sound like they did what they thought their daughter needed by monitoring her computer usage. While some think 13 is too young for a relationship, many kids at that age are doing far worse than chatting with a boy online. The neighbors who created the boy are sick and twisted. They purposely misled the girl and created "Josh" only to hurt her. They are to blame! Their prank led to her death, therefore they should be punished. I am disappointed that these adults can walk free after killing an innocent girl.
paleojenn1 at 11:42AM on Dec 4th 2007
12. Megan had problems? Seems to me its the Drews that were emotionally crippled! 13 is young - but what can one say about her tormenters maturity?
Robert E. Quillen at 11:56AM on Dec 4th 2007
13. This was truly a horrible ordeal, Megan’s parents should be held partially responsible for their daughter’s death. Myspace and other sites like it should be band for any and all teenagers by parents who really care about their child(rens) safety on the internet. It should be band, block, disallowed whatever you need to do for your children not to have access to it from your computers. Yes, it is easy to do, I have a 15 year old that uses the computer and yes I monitor her while she is on, and Myspace and others like it are on my disallowed list, and to make it even easier to monitor her I set up a list of all the sites that she is allowed to go on, so if the website is not on that list, she can’t get to it. All of the things you her about Myspace why would any parent knowing allow their children to join it??? Don’t be afraid your child will hate you for it; it’s called loving and protecting them, do it!
Umm at 12:14PM on Dec 4th 2007
14. The fault lies with the parents, why were they medicating her, ADHD is a crock does not exist the drugs make a child easier to handle. And I have yet to meet a 13 year old girl who is not a mental basket case it is called puberty not a mental disorder yet they drugged her for that too. They keep saying it's not your fault hunny here take drugs. Then the girl kills herself and again it can't be the parents fault so lets blame the neighbors. The neighbors did a stupid childish thing but if you listen to the facts witch on the network stations are near impossible to find, the adults involved helped set up the account but knew nothing of the last days of comments until after the fact. No the blame goes directly to the girls parents, and the people now threatening the Drews are 10 times worse than the Drew's and i hope they are prosicuted my the very law this incident inspired
pac779 at 12:39PM on Dec 4th 2007
15. To Blame Megans parents is disgusting. Just because Megan was on medication does not mean she was "disturbed". It means she was depressed. And clearly her parents did what all the experts say they were supposed to do. The people who did this are disgustng excuses for human beings. They must have such low self esteem that torturing a 13 year old girl is the only way they can feel better about themselves. I hope they have to hide forever. To Megans parents I say I am so sorry this happened to you. You are in my prayers.
Roberta at 1:00PM on Dec 4th 2007