We just ran a story on Babble called "The Grinch: Why I won't let my child believe in Santa," by a mother who has decided to tell her child the truth about Santa from the get-go. Here's a piece of her argument:I am a woman who likes to give credit where credit is due. I send my thank-you notes to the right people, and I would like my daughter to do the same. I would like to thank my child directly for being good. And if I spend hours finding, wrapping and presenting a series of gifts to my child, then I would like her to know they are from me. We still have a tree and gifts and gingerbread. It doesn't make the season any less magical.
One of our favorite comments in Babble's very feisty comments section (warning: it's a little bit of a Jesus vs. Santa smackdown) wrote:
Myths speak to universal human questions and desires. They keep us questioning and marveling and hoping. For children, I think, myths are especially important, because they teach the importance of believing in things that aren't measurable and tangible and concrete: love and generosity and forgiveness . . . I have trouble with calling Santa a "lie," just like I have trouble when people call novels and short stories "lies." Sometimes the "lies" are truer than reality.
Read the story here and tell us what you think. Did you believe in Santa as a kid? Are you encouraging your kids to believe?
Reader Comments ( Page 1 of 12)
1. I think the lady should chill. It's fun for a kid to believe in Santa and his elves, the Easter Bunny, Mr. Sandman and the Tooth Fairy.
I've run into some folks (and they are judgmental and morose)who refuse to watch the movie Mary Poppins because they believe she is a witch.
The Goddess Athena at 8:43AM on Dec 21st 2007
2. I agree with the writer, and my two boys, ages 13 and 10, have never had Santa give them anything. Have they had deprived childhoods? I think not. We choose to celebrate the birth of Jesus, and not have a commercial Christmas. Everyone is entitled to celebrate how they wish, and that includes having Santa or not. Just don't tell me I am doing wrong by not lying to my kids!
Annabelle at 9:19AM on Dec 21st 2007
3. I would like to know if Ada believed in Santa as a child? If so, she grew up with enough knowledge to know that you should be thankful to people and give credit where credit is due. My husband and I wrap gifts from us to our children and put them under the tree. On Christmas morning, my children wake up to presents from Santa laying out in the living room floor unwrapped. It's just like you see in coloring books and cartoons. The toys are unwrapped and each child has their own section. It's like Santa came and dropped off the toys fresh from his toy factory. They are so excited 'cause it's all laying out in front of them, they don't know what to play with first! After a while of them playing with toys from Santa, we all sit down open our gifts to each other. It's the way that I grew up and I loved it. My children also love it! My husband's parents wrapped their gifts and put them under the tree from Santa. My husband likes the way that I do it much better. Merry Christmas!
kristy at 9:16AM on Dec 21st 2007
4. The most magical day of my life was my 4th Christmas. I went to bed with no tree or decorations in our apartment. When I woke up we had a sparkling decorated tree with gifts under it. Plus a room full of doll furniture. That one day gave me the ability to have faith and to believe in miracles for life. Learning who Santa really was later on didn't change the magic at all. But I don't think it would have been nearly as magical had I known on that day. .... The most selfless kind of giving is the giving you don't seek credit for. It says something about a person who always needs to be acknowledged for every single thing they do and give.
jnlwriter at 9:42AM on Dec 21st 2007
5. My household believed in Santa. It didn't last long, it pretty much came to an end with starting school. But while it did last, I thought is was fun.
My family has always attended church, so they knew what Christmas celebration was and this took precedence over Santa. But still, when they were young, I didn't see any harm in Santa.
And to be honest with you, I really miss the two chocolate chip cookies and glass of milk they'd leave out for him (that was my idea).....Santa and me really liked chocolate chip cookies.
Willet at 10:11AM on Dec 21st 2007
6. Whoa. She writes: "We still have a tree and gifts and gingerbread. It doesn't make the season any less magical" Magical??!!! Uh - if there's no Santa, there sure as heck isn't "magic". Duh.
If she wants her kid to know where the presents came from she should put her name or "Mom" in the 'from:' area of the gift tag - that's what it's there for.
Sounds like someone needs a therapist and a DVD copy of Miracle on 34th Street.
Good luck with all that lady.
PS. Santa IS real.
Jaqi at 1:30PM on Dec 21st 2007
7. SANTA ! I LOVE YOU.........!
ida at 10:33AM on Dec 21st 2007
8. My son is 4 and we are Christians.
While I LOVE Christmas and everyone sitting down watching the classic Santa Claus movies and Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer. I've decided to teach my son what Santa is really about from the get go. The explanation and/or idea that I try and give him is that Santa Claus sort of like a cartoon, like Scooby-Doo. He isn't a real human being but he represents the fun of Christmas. He is, however, based off of a real human being, St. Nicholas.
I'd like him to understand that Christmas is meant to be about celebrating the birth of Christ and family and love and giving. I've also told him that even though we try and celebrate Christ's birth during Christmas, scientifically, Jesus probably was born during spring. Some scholars believe they can point down his birth to April 17( 6BC ) He gets a kick out of the fact that him and Jesus might have the same birthday.
I think there's nothing harmful with the idea of Santa Claus but I don't think there is any reason he needs to believe that the dude really exists. I mean seriously, I'm not feeling too jolly with the idea of some strange man breaking into my house in the middle of the night lol.
Ann Losito at 10:44AM on Dec 21st 2007
9. She has a child? Wonders never cease? My grown children still believe in the spirit of Santa...UH giving and receiving. Which by the way is the same thing. This Christmas I am glad I am not her child.
Bet Killette at 11:05AM on Dec 21st 2007
10. SMACKDOWN. Funny, Ada.
The ages from 3 (when language really takes off) and 6 or 7 are called the "magical years". Children this age can readily believe in any nonsense you tell them.
It's probably harmless, but I remember being very anxious when I was 4 that we didn't have a chimney for Santa to come down. So as I was going to bed, my parents opened the front door for "Santa".
I think young children should be given respect of their intellectual and emotional development.
Bad things, as well as good things are instilled in them at this age. Sometimes forever.
I personally think that children that age should not be introduced to religion and the superstitious beliefs therein until they are 7 or 8. Give them a chance to develop some intelligence before you tell them that "magic" jesus is just as real as santa: but wait, MORE real.
Linda at 11:09AM on Dec 21st 2007
11. Santa brought my young daughter a gift or two (enough to entertain her while daddy and mommy got a smidge of sleep) and a stack of gifts from Mom and Dad and other family members. When she questioned the truth of Santa, we talked about how maybe Santa isn't a real person, like you and me. Maybe Santa is all the things we love about families and friends, compassion and generosity, special treats and lots of love. Santa is more like "Mother Nature" or "Father Time." This perspective preserves the magic, while holding up well to freethinkers.
Sounds like this woman is more concerned with getting credit for her gift-purchasing abilities than with the look of innocent wonder on her little one's face. Lady, Christmas giving isn't about buffing up your "Boy, Am I A Wonderful Mom" resume.
Joan at 11:23AM on Dec 21st 2007
12. Sounds to me like the lady is self-centered. She's trying to make Christmas all about her. Who cares if the child is happy and delighted, so long as the mother gets all the credit.
Myths are important to our lives. They tell the truth in the general form of a lie, and, as such, are most true, being most honest. Facts are on the only source of truth in the world.
Troy Camplin at 11:17AM on Dec 21st 2007
13. I personally never believed in Santa... I don't think that it takes anything away from children... When I heard the lie that some man comes down your chimney and gives you all of your gifts I was upset with my parents... That Christmas I stayed up all night and watched my family room to see if anyone came down the chimney, but all I saw was my parents putting toys together and wrapping gifts... They never knew I was up that night, but it gave me an appreciation for my parents because I knew that I could count on them to always tell me the truth... I think that it is devestating for a child to believe in Santa and then one day the only people he knew he could trust turn out to be total liars... The whole myth for children takes away from their parents as being honest and trustworthy human beings
aramak85 at 11:20AM on Dec 21st 2007
14. "Myths are important to our lives. They tell the truth in the general form of a lie, and, as such, are most true, being most honest. Facts are on the only source of truth in the world."
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Does anyone else see how confused this guy is?
Myths are myths. They are stories. There is nothing wrong with identifying them as myths, even to children.
Linda at 11:22AM on Dec 21st 2007
15. It is very disturbing to read these parents having no faith in their children's maturity. A child is not going to be devastated when they find out that Santa is not real and to not even give their children a chance to beileve in a miracle and magic disgusts me. The woman who wrote this article believes that she deserves credit for her gifts but has she not heard of giving and not expecting something back. I believe that yes kids should say thank you but if they do not remember they are still children and their faces as they open the presents from Santa should be thanks enough. It is sad that some people take the fun out of everything! AND by you teaching your child that there is no Santa remember that your child is going to ruin it for the rest of us who want our children to believe and that is selfish. Santa is real!
Michelle at 11:32AM on Dec 21st 2007