The latest breastfeeding trend: exclusively using a pump rather than nursing. According to this Babble dispatch by Kate Tuttle, more and more women are choosing to give their baby breast milk but not actually delivering it via the breast. One tragic reason is a repulsion toward employing the sexualized breast in the context of a baby:Although there are certainly some women who exclusively pump because of such attitudes, most come to it accidentally, through a combination of a bad start at nursing and a conviction that breast milk is best, even if it doesn't come "straight from the tap."
We know a couple of people who went this route because of physical problems. It seemed like all the hard parts of breastfeeding with only one of the good parts (the milk). So hats off to anyone who spend so much time hooked up to a breast pump in order to get milk to their babies. Hear, hear, to Kate's call for more and better lactation consultation at hospitals, and for raising consciousness about the fact that breasts can actually be both sexy and a source of food.
You can read the whole story here.
Reader Comments ( Page 2 of 6)
16. Ah - here we go.. the typical stuff I expected back. FYI - I am not speaking about personal experience, but rather PROFESSIONAL experience.
I have been a floor nurse in L&D for over 10 years. During that time I have watched overzealous and cultish La Leche League advocates totally put off scores of young women from even trying breast feeding by having an attitude of trying to shame them into it, ridiculing their pain (as a poster above did), and basically intimating that they aren't caring for their child properly or nurturing them if they don't feed from the breast, as again, an above poster did.
These young women might have at least been encouraged to pump and feed if this had not been done in this severe way. Pumping and feeding may have even lead to natural breast feeding as they got comfortable with it, or at least encourage them to attempt to try again with the next child.
But, by the time the breast feeding advocates were done with them, they had basically all been made very upset and resistant to listening to anyone in the hospital about the subject. Many nurses in my unit were disgusted with the overzealous breast feeding advocates destroying our patient rapport on this issue.
We succeded in having some rules put in place that limited the overzealousness and harsh methods and laid out all options with gentle suggestion, plenty of support, lots of sympathy for pain or difficulties, and NO PERSECUTION OF A PERSONAL CHOICE.
Due to this, we now have far more young moms giving it a go. Our ratios of moms leaving that are trying to breast feed has gone through the roof, and quite frankly, the mood on the unit is much, much happier.
I am struck by the lack of compassion of someone that would suggest a woman is not naturally nurturing her child if she feeds formula from a bottle or chooses to pump and feed. I am also struck by the sadism of someone that would ridicule or minimize another's pain. To me, that is abuse.
Is this a game of who can be a bigger martyr for their child? I see this too much, and it is really mentally ill. Women need to quit being such backbiting shrews and support each other instead of seeking to cut each other down.
Vikki C. at 1:26PM on Jan 18th 2008
17. Haiku, have you stopped to consider that by bottlefeeding breast milk you are allowing the father some bonding time to nurture his child? Bottlefeeding breast milk gives infants the best of both worlds, better nutrition and equal bonding opportunity with both parents.
Jennifer M. at 1:55PM on Jan 18th 2008
18. Ada, sleep medicine and orthodontic studies show that actual breast feeding is best. While bottle feeding actual breast milk is better than feeding your child formula, it is not the best for your child. Kids that do not breast feed many times end up with underdeveloped palates, constricted tongue space, orthodontic issues, TMJ problems, and can develope sleep apnea. Many kids that are diagnosed with ADD or ADHD, actually have sleeping problems because they have developed Obstructive Sleep Apnea (OSA) because their mouths did not develop properly during infancy. The childs suckling presses the nipple against the roof of the mouth, puts pressure on the soft bones up there, causes them to spread, and generates plenty of tongue space for the tongue. Mothers, if you have an infant, and you want that child to be their best, they can be; breast feed your children
ken at 1:41PM on Jan 18th 2008
19. While i understand and value the lovely experience of bonding with your baby through breast feeding i must say i was forced into pumping and bottle feeding. Simply because i had to return to work and once my son got the bottle, he was no longer interested in the labor of suckling. I picked up the pieces from feeling unwanted and allowed him the liberty to choose. Thus i lost and the pump and bottle won. It was all about giving him what he wanted and what was healthy for him. This issue shoul be more widely considered when women are looked down upon for not allowing the baby to suckle. Sometimes it's the baby that is not interested.
Rio at 1:42PM on Jan 18th 2008
20. I think my oldest daughter latched on wrong the first day or two and bruised the sensitive tissue in my nipple. The next week was hell. I cried every time I nursed, but pumping was equally painful. I almost gave up altogether but my husband was very supportive and wouldn't let me quit (thank goodness). I think more women should try toughing it out for at least a couple weeks to see if it gets easier. If not though, then hey, at least their babies are getting some of the benefits of breast milk. They'll miss out on a fulfilling experience but that's their choice.
Lola1979 at 2:21PM on Jan 18th 2008
21. I went all 3 routes with my kids. I bottlefed one one breastmilk, I fed one formula, and I nursed the last. Breastfeeding was the best experience by far but expressing and bottlefeeding breast milk was the worst. My first child had a high palate and was not able to nurse but I wanted him to have breastmilk. It is exhausting during a time when you're already exhausted. It becomes your full time job, if you aren't feeding then you're expressing milk (which can take half an hour or more) or sterilizing bottles, or cleaning out and sterilizing the pump and then by you have all that done, it's time to feed again. I started supplimenting after 6 weeks, it was TOO much. People need to stop being so militant about this and trying to make young women feel like they're bad mothers for making the very personal choice to give formula. Even though he had formula, my firstborn turned out better than fine. He is on the honor roll, in the gifted program at school and is actually a little underweight for his age. I think all of these 'formula problems' are the result of other parenting choices, not the formula.
Jen at 2:42PM on Jan 18th 2008
22. I nursed two babies....My husband was a bit jealous with the first(boy)(hmmm....) and sometimes gave me alot of grief for nursing..(even though I also pumped so that he could feed) I think if I wasnt so stubborn I may have given in to his grief and stopped nursing pretty early. I wonder how many do not nurse their babies because of how their men respond to it??hmmm.....Second baby he was alot more suppotive(girl)(hmmm.....)Silly boys tits are for kids! LOL and by the way nursing was sometimes painful if the latch on wasnt quite right..(thank you LANSINOH!) but it would heal in a couple of days..pumping was sometimes uncomfortable as well but not so bad.............. And also......something that helped me around the idea that there are teeth to contend with when nursing...knowing that they cannot suck and bite at the same time...so never had a problem with that either....and one more thing, I promise :) I never saw anyone one from Leleche league at my hospital either time and the nurses were all about breastfeeding...they even gave me my first pump :)
rubylily at 3:47PM on Jan 18th 2008
23. My breasts have been fibrocystic for as long as I have had breasts. When I had my daughter, I tried desperately to breastfeed, but she became severely ill from dehydration. Turned out my cysts were surrounding my milk ducts and limiting my supply. Her pediatrician and my lactation consultant told me to exclusively pump because that was the only way to measure her intake. I had to supplement the remainder with formula.
So there are good reasons to pump that have nothing to do with the sexualization of breasts. But for the record, I found pumping far more painful that breastfeeding.
Indigo at 3:58PM on Jan 18th 2008
24. In response to #6, Haiku1VT:
First of all, I'm glad to hear that you were able to nurse your 3 kids without problems. That's great for you and your kids.
However you are the one who needs to grow up. There are many women in this world (myself included) who are not like you and did not have it easy nursing.
My daughter was not a good latcher, and when she finally did latch she was what the doctors called a "savorer," meaning she spent 30 minutes on one breast then 30 minutes on the other. She'd sleep for an hour or two and was ready to nurse for an hour again. It was exhausting.
Because of how she nursed, my milk production dropped and I had to get on Reglen and start pumping to get enough milk to feed her. I pumped and we fed her breastmilk from bottles for 6 1/2 months until I was so exhausted from it that I couldn't do it anymore.
You, who had it so easy, have no idea the sacrifice of time, energy, and sometimes pain those of us who don't have an easy time go through, so you need to keep your mouth and your snide comments to yourself. Why don't you try encouraging other women who have problems (i.e. telling what worked for you, sharing times when it was hard for you) instead of putting the rest of us down.
We all know breastmilk is best - duh, it's driven into us by the experts from the time that we find out we're pregnant. And I think there is a lot to be said for mothers who "tough it out" despite the pain, tiredness, etc. (see Jen's post, #14). So before you lash out at those women who do have pain (thankfully I was not one of them but I sympathize with them) why don't you try standing in their shoes for a minute? It's not like they could take a lot of painkillers to alleviate it?
And as far as the nurturing goes, you can nurture other ways then by having the breast. We fed my daughter solely out of a bottle from 4 weeks on, sometimes supplementing with formula, so I of course missed out on lots of breast-bonding time. She is almost 2 now and we have the best relationship. She is smart, well-behaved, loving, and all-around joy to be with. I actually quit pumping at 7 months because I realized what all I was missing by spending so much time on the pump. What was more important, giving her breastmilk or being a part of her life?
My mother-in-law (who nursed all of her children and sounds ironically very similar to how you sound) often made comments to me about my failures as a milk machine. Finally at about 4 months I'd had it and I told her (very sarcastically) how glad I was that God had blessed her with better boobs than me.
I know many women who were not able to pump like I was due to many different reasons that have nothing to do with selfishness or laziness. These women tried everything imaginable and still were unable to get milk to their babies. They've struggled through many eras of emotional depression because they feel guilty for not giving milk, feel guilty for not breast nurturing. The ironic thing is that these women are some of the best mothers I've ever seen and would do anything for their kids.
Jennifer in #12 gives another great reason for pumping or formula feeding from the bottle- let the daddies get involved!
I don't mean to be ugly, but your comments are hurtful and mean and can beat down a women who's already struggling within herself about nursing her child. Why don't you be part of the solution instead of part of the problem?
Tara at 4:35PM on Jan 18th 2008
25. Recently heard a discussion about how a child in utero can pick up on a mother's emotional vibe and that it can affect the child's willingness to latch on to the breast.
I remember the first time I heard that my mom hadn't breastfed me. I had such a visceral gut reaction of indignation. Now, as an adult, I wonder if her ambivelance about an unexpected (and possibly unwanted) pregnancy was played out in her inability to breastfeed.
Granted, there are no cut and dried answers or solutions since each mother and child scenario comes with so many variables. It would be interesting, though, to know what Dr. Lawrence, et al, thought about how the mother's psychological state during pregnancy affected the success of breastfeeding.
Josiejo at 4:42PM on Jan 18th 2008
26. To #9, Vikki C.:
PREACH IT, SISTER!
Thank you for sharing a professional's POV on this issues. I hope you continue to have success and better rapport with new moms on your floor. Thank you for having a progressive, supportive attitude.
Tara at 5:06PM on Jan 18th 2008
27. I nursed my son for 9 months and enjoyed every moment of it. I plan on doing the same with any other children I have. For me it's about bonding with baby.
azstate2007 at 5:57PM on Jan 18th 2008
28. I have 4 children and NONE were breast fed. I tried with my firstborn but was unable to. We did not have pumps back then so they were all bottle fed with yes, the dreaded formula. I feel sorry for all those who feel they have to defend themselves for their personal decision of breastfeeding or not. That is a PERSONAL choice like any other parental decision. The problem is we tend to pick out everything another parent does wrong instead of concentrating on OUR OWN parental choices. My children are stable, strong, bright and very loving adults who are now in the process of raising their own children. The bond I have with my own children and my grandchildren is by far one of the strongest you will ever see. We have a connection that developed through my love throughout the years, not the breast or bottle; thats where they got their early nourishment. I know women who breast fed and their children had to have braces put on and also I know many women who breast fed their children who are now unemployed, drug users, dropped out of school, had problems with relationships etc... I also know women who bottle fed and have the same issues. People, including doctors need to stop worrying so much about how the baby is fed (as long as he/she is properly nourished) and put that energy into helping with perhaps angry parents, parents who are single and struggling, drug addicted parents (many of whom are into breast feeding) medically ill parents etc... surely this is more of a detrimental problem to the infant than bottle or breast milk. Never mind the so called "studies" but in "real life" I would like to get together perhaps 50 young adults and see how many people can separate "which" ones are the breast fed and which are bottle fed. We might all be very surprised at the results. As for women who breast feed, like my daughter does with my grandchildren; I say "way to go, good job mommy" and for those who feed formula from a bottle; I say
"way to go, good job mommy". Love your child, teach them to love, be there for them throughout their lives, spend precious time together and you will have a healthy well loved child that is ready for this sometimes cruel world and ready for their own tough decision "to breast feed or to bottle feed".
Isn't it hard enough being a mommy without adding another worry??? And don't any of you mommies out there ever feel bad because you think something is missing for your child because you bottle fed. It is YOUR choice and you have to be comfortable with it. Life has far too many complications as it is and with parenting, you will always hear those for circumsion, those against it, those for pacifiers, those against it, those for the potty, those for the toilet. Raising children is a never ending cycle of decisions and you will never have the approval of everyone every time. No matter what your decision, enjoy your babies ladies.. and God Bless all those little angels; they are ALL precious as are their mommies....
BklynLady at 6:03PM on Jan 18th 2008
29. The benefits of breastfeeding are not just the nutrients found in breast milk. The way a baby suckles at the breast helps to widen the baby's palate and can help prevent future dental problems. Bottlefeeding cannot reproduce that and in fact can result in an open bite, narrow palate, or other problems.
Jen at 6:18PM on Jan 18th 2008
30. this is to Mary andHailwivt---it always continues to suprise me the insensitivity of people and the assumptions that someone else is lazier and less of a mom than we are. I am an OB/GYN and assumed I would breast feed. when my daught was born i tried!!!!!!!!! we couldn't do it, she hated it, my nipples were beyound flat, she couldn't get enough milk, the shields did not work..Knowing the benefits for her, and for me ( dec brest cancer) i pumped--- for me it was much more painful, more work (sterilizing, bottles as well as pump assecories) I bleed often!!! thorugh the nipples-- very fibrocystic breast-- and carried a heavy pump around, had to pump in closets, bathroom, etc---> My daughter only received breastmilk for over 10 month and had breastmilk for about 2 years---It was a tremendous commitment and I was happy was able to do it and that I had an option on how to do it..
Also I feel I still bonded with her, since always gave her the bottle myself ( most of the times) and once she had sone formula or regular milk-- she would hate it and ask for mine>
Did you guys eve consider babies that cannot fe3ed except with special nipples because of cleft lip and cleft palate?? babies with facial nerve damage that canot suck and need Gtubes? thank heavens that these moms have the options of still giving babies breastmilk via pump-----never assume someone is doing a different version out of lazyness---old adage but true--walk a mile in their shoes.
gabe at 5:45PM on Jan 21st 2008