Endearingly batty New York Post gossip columnist Cindy Adams brought her wisdom to bear on the Spitzer dust up, addressing Spitzer's wife like so: I want to tell her - so what. She may not longer be New York's first lady, but a husband hooking up with a hooker is not reason enough to no longer be a married lady.
Sex, a primal need, outpoints fear, hunger and love as mankind's No. 1 driving force. Unless you're a pig or a monk, many an able-bodied - and I use that term deliberately - 48-year-old husband of 21 years has grazed. I'm not advocating it. I'm merely saying, so what? It's like takeout food. Less work for mother.
Did she say TAKEOUT FOOD? And it gets even wackier from there. Adams writes:
A man who adores a woman enough to make his family with her and wants her forever as No. 1 in his life in a drawing room or dining room might also respect and treasure her too much for what he wants in a bedroom.
Paying a pro isn't disrespect to his wife. Disrespect is keeping, supporting, housing a mistress with whom there's an ongoing relationship and with whom you share not only time but emotions and thoughts and life. Disrespect is dumping into a trash bin that partner, long out of the workforce after giving her all including her youth, to marry whatever new twinkie works your male menopausal pinky.
The real reason this Cindy Adams column seems so crazy, beyond its insanely old-fashioned concept of male-female relationships, is that she seems blithely unaware of why this scandal is so sad to so many of us: we thought he was a genuinely honest, good guy. It turns out he not only committed a crime while prosecuting others who commit such crimes, but he showed in his manner a truly depraved character.
Specifically:
He haggled over price. Tacky.
He asked the women to do "not safe" things. Creepy.
He got caught, throwing the state's government into chaos and destroying his home. Pathetic.
He committed the ultimate hypocrisy. Unforgivable.
This guy is more than "reckless," as he's been described by some colleagues. He's bad.
There's a difference between hiring a prostitute or having an affair because you're lonely (which we can understand) and hiring a prostitute because you want to show off how powerful you are, to make a woman do something that even experienced hookers balk at. That's just gross. And it reveals a flawed character that would not make a good governor, or a good husband - for anyone except maybe Cindy Adams.
Reader Comments ( Page 2 of 3)
16. Geesh, where was the uproar when this idiot was trying to give all the illegal aliens in New York drivers licenses? Hitlerry even agreed with him on that one. Have you noticed in most of the news stories about this fiasco that he's just Eliot Spitzer, not Eliot Spitzer - (D-NY). If I was his wife, I'd castrate him while he slept.
Tony at 7:51AM on Mar 13th 2008
17. I think the shame here is that they are choosing to obsess on the angle of sex, which is a private matter, not worthy of this much public consideration. The public should be focusing on this man's unethical behavior in regard to his important job. He has surely failed himself and everyone else with this foolish and hypocritical action. My hope is that his punishments will fit the crime.
Mettle at 2:41PM on Mar 13th 2008
18. Gone fishing - LOL! Who told you there were NO mirrors in the White House? I have been to the White House in the period you state, and I can assure you, there were many mirrors in the White House, and YES, even in their private residence upstairs.
Mettle at 8:17AM on Mar 13th 2008
19. Prostitutes are at risk for HIV. Having sex with a prostitute puts you (and your wife) at risk for AIDS. (I doubt tht this risk-taking guy used a condom.) Not very respectful.
Bruce Peterson at 7:51PM on Mar 13th 2008
20. I think it's time that political wives had a different option than standing by their men. I heard Lisa Bloom of TruTV commenting on this the other night, and I have to agree. It seems that no matter how bad it gets for a political wife, she is expected to make the rallying speech and the obligatory "our family is intact" line.
I'd like to see ONE of these women stand up and say .. "NO! This is NOT ok! I am NOT going to stand at the podium and support this. SHAME ON YOU!!"
Women don't have to be mute and dutiful anymore.
Catherine at 9:49AM on Mar 13th 2008
21. Silda is one classy lady. I doubt she needs any advice from such as us. You shouldn't presume to know why she is doing what she is. As for the prostitution angle, it shouldn't be illegal to begin with, but it is so he has to face that issue. Silda can and will decide how she handles this.
Larry at 10:20AM on Mar 13th 2008
22. The position some wmoen are taking is inexcusable - even Dr. Laura implied on the today show that it's the wife's fault for not satisfying a powerful husband. Give me a break, one last minute tryst maybe forgivable; but there were so many elements to just this one night - all the various money trails, calls, arrangments - this was Pre-meditated!! and to the tune of $80K over several appointments.....get a backbone women - this sends the wrong message to his daughters (who are only a few years younger) - how would he feel is someone paid for creepy acts with them!
Liz at 2:37PM on Mar 13th 2008
23. I would imagine that Ms. Spitzer is going through the same calculations that every woman learns at a young age; the ones that see which strategy nets her the most money. When the divorce column adds up to more money, she will leave.
Right now I would suspect that the divorce column is looking pretty good.
Bobber at 10:27AM on Mar 13th 2008
24. I partially agree with Cindy Adams. I don't think she is as old-fashioned as you claim, Ada. Many people have a relaxed sexual morality code. Indeed, if you can have sex without love, is it not therefore possible to have love without sex? It is possible to have two people committed to each other and have sex with others. Is it the norm? Hardly. But let us not enforce our beliefs in what is right and wrong onto somebody else's personal life, eh? Not everyone follows the same code of conduct. If by SILDA'S beliefs, she has grounds to leave him, then she can. But all of these people saying she MUST dump him are just being silly. It's their life. Just deal with the legal aspect of what he did wrong and be done with it.
Strados at 11:39AM on Mar 13th 2008
25. You know I think he just wanted a younger version of her. They practically look alike with just gaps in their age and what age does to people
The Angela and the wife that is.
Anne at 12:51PM on Mar 13th 2008
26. Please explain to me why she should stay! Silda, darlin' take him for all he's got. Divorce him, and then retire to somewhere quiet with a cute little boy-toy, you deserve it! And once that is done, perhaps your former hubby can hook up with Ms. Adams- let's see how she deals with that!
Robert at 11:53AM on Mar 13th 2008
27. I have to agree with the women who write that his wife stands there beside him so pitiful looking and never say a word. If this was my husband and he acted like this, the entire world would be hearing from me. I am sick that women do this and then say " he had a sickness and I love him!!" Well explain that to your kids and tell them it's okay when their future spouses cheat on them. Her and Hilary Clinton both make me sick with this poor poor me mentality. I say stand there, let him speak, then smack the shit out of him and laugh all the way to the bank!!
Paula at 12:51PM on Mar 13th 2008
28. Ada, you are too nice. This man goes to prostitutes because no normal woman would ever be a "twinkie for his pinky." Who'd have an affair with such a miserable, ugly, arrogant, and merciless little reptile? The best advice for Silda is to feed him to the lions.
Gwen at 1:30PM on Mar 13th 2008
29. Ada,I'm with you. What if he had given his wife AIDS? This guy has no respect for anyone.
IRONBLUEEYES at 5:45PM on Mar 13th 2008
30. "Those without sin cast the first stone." Yes, what he has done is wrong. Yes, he has to be prosecuted like anyone else. There is absoultely no excuse for what he has done. His wife has been there him for this long, and apparently it show that there marriage need help...the whole family needs help at this point. This man has been thru so much and he has so much more coming to him. For Cindy Adams write what she did is horrible. Think about it...If someone if your immediate family or your extended family was going thru the same thing, what would you do? Would you disgard them and tell them how horrible they were, or would you be a support system for them because you love them.
innerbeautyinc at 2:23PM on Mar 13th 2008