 David Archuleta |
 Brooke White |
On Wednesday night's American Idol results show, something extraordinary happened: The first of the Top Ten finalists announced was tiger beat boy David Archuleta. The second was the group's "Mommy" Brooke White.
So for at least a few minutes 100% of the confirmed finalists were Mormons. Think about that.
This day was a day that was never supposed to come. Indeed for the first few seasons of Idol the idea of an openly Mormon Top Ten finalist was simply unfathomable. (Statistics on Mormon Idol contestants are famously unreliable.) Clearly times have changed. Is this a belated validation of the strides made by the Mitt Romney candidacy? Perhaps. Although the Republican ex-Governor's campaign failed, he forced Americans to come to terms with their anti-LDS prejudices and emboldened Mormon voters (and singers?) to flex their muscle (and vocal cords?).
Whatever the ramifications of this explosion of out and proud LDS singers, the question must be asked: Are Mormons simply better at singing than other Christian denominations? The answer seems to be yes.
With 5.5 million church members in the U.S., they represent less than 2% of the population. And yet they're 20% of the Idol Top Ten. (Factor in the international scope of this year's competition - itself a controversy - and the LDS representation is even more impressive.) No other Christian denomination comes close.
The Osmonds, of course, are the best example of what critics call the "Mormon Melody Mafia." Out of nine children born to George and Olive Osmond, seven (a whopping 77%) are gifted singers. The other two, Virl and Tom, are deaf. Yet even they appreciate music, having appeared on The Donnie and Marie Christmas Special in 1978.
So why are Mormons such good singers?
- They don't smoke. (I love Bonnie Tyler as much as anyone, but raspy-voiced singers spend their careers swimming upstream.)
- They don't drink alcohol or caffeine.
- They have large families that sing together at home and in tabernacle choirs. On a trip to Salt Lake City in 1999 I had the great pleasure of sitting through a rehearsal of the Mormon Tabernacle Choir. The acoustics: astonishing. The organ: 11,623 pipes. The experience: unforgettable. One of my favorite cds remains the choir singing civil war hymns.
- They live at high altitudes. Because they're used to thin air, their breath control is unrivaled. (Whether that gives them an unfair advantage at sea level is another matter.)
- They don't dance.
(That Marie Osmond could put one foot in front of the other on Dancing with the Stars was a miracle. Of course it would have helped had she practiced more and shrieked about her doll collection less.)
Not surprisingly the first of the Top Twelve finalists eliminated was lap-dancer David Hernandez. (Lap-dancing is strictly forbidden in Utah, with two exceptions: the Olympic village in 2002 was granted dispensation. Plus there's a club in Provo that sells membership cards for lap-dancing.) I liked David Hernandez but I suspect he would have sounded better had he not spread himself so thin.
So what do you think? Why are Mormons so much better than other Christians at singing?
***
HELP WANTED:
- I'm still looking for material for my cabaret show featuring music about states. Specifically I'm looking for a recording of - or even just sheet music for - the early 20th century song "When it's Apple Blossom Time in Orange, New Jersey, we'll make a Peach of a Pair." (I realize that this is more about fruit than New Jersey, but it sounds like a winner.) Also has anyone heard Steve Allen's song "Spring in Maine"? Is it any good?
- Is anyone reading involved in planning a 200th birthday celebration for Abraham Lincoln? I'm a huge Lincoln lover and want to get involved. I emailed historian Richard Norton Smith at George Mason University, but he hasn't responded. (He once gave me a private tour of the Lincoln Museum in Springfield, so I'm guessing he's just been busy. Or maybe he's still sore at my Mary Todd Lincoln wisecracks.)
Reader Comments ( Page 1 of 5)
1. Mo, I love you but Mormons can dance. Many of the people on those dance shows are Mormon! Benji was LDS. His cousin was in the top four. LDS His sister was in the top four, lds.
MormonHammer at 1:32AM on Mar 21st 2008
2. First!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GnNsMpB0Zmk
FINN at 2:00AM on Mar 21st 2008
3. You are forgetting Carmen Rasmusen, who made it to the top six in the show's second season.
She is very Mormon, now happily married to the Lieutenant Governor of Utah's son, and one of my favorite singers from the whole series.
Jed Merrill at 2:09AM on Mar 21st 2008
4. Brooke White is great in part because she is alone in being able to go on national TV and say she has never seen an R rated movie. She is a shining star (example) for more than her very real talent.
In my opinion, she elevates the show, and America right along with it!
Jed Merrill at 2:12AM on Mar 21st 2008
5. Isn't "So You Think You Can Dance" dominated by Mormons, as well? I guess I need to stop confusing them with the Amish.
CurtL at 2:27AM on Mar 21st 2008
6. Julianne Hough who is the 2 time winning choreographer on "Dancing with the Stars" and her brother who is also on the show are MORMON. BYU has a winning ballroom dance team as well.
stephanie at 3:13AM on Mar 21st 2008
7. Well there goes the house of cards.
John Giza at 3:29AM on Mar 21st 2008
8. It is right to mention the Osmond Family and they important part they play in Music and the name of The Church.
One Mormon singer we really need to push is
David L Osmond one of the son's of Osmond Alan. David sang lead in "Second Generation" he has done much solo work in the last 18 months and it is truly exceptional. I am committed to seeing David release a solo album, he deserves it!
John B Sheffield at 3:30AM on Mar 21st 2008
9. NO, IT'S NOT MORMONS WHO SING BETTER, IT'S THOSE WHO ATTEND THE BLACK CHURCHES. BY THE WAY, OBAMA'S MINISTER--THAT WRIGHT GUY; ISN'T HE THE SAME "REVEREND WRIGHT WHO, DURING THE LEWINSKY CRISIS, WAS SUMMONED TO THE WHITE HOUSE SO THAT SLICK WILLIE COULD MAKE KNOWN TO THE WORLD HIS "MEA CULPA" ABOUT HAVING INVENTED THE PHRASE ".I'VE BEEN LEWINSKIED."
Strong at 4:23AM on Mar 21st 2008
10. I never will see an American Idol episode 'cause it't not my fave TV. Jeopardy is among my fave TV and Ken Jennings had scary special Mormon Powers.
SallyMutant at 5:10AM on Mar 21st 2008
11. THIS RECENT ARCHAEOLOGICAL DISCOVERY IS TRIGGERING THE COLLAPSE OF THE MORMON CHURCH
http://www.youtube.com/swf/l.swf?video_id=hcyzkd_m6KE
PAUL MANNING at 6:32AM on Mar 21st 2008
12. I'm afraid of Mormons, singing or otherwise.
Also Jehova's witnesses, but that's just because they come to the door. I'm also afraid of home improvement solicitors, political canvassers, mail-carriers, stray cats and over-friendly neighbors.
And,obviously, Osmonds.
But all this is notwithstanding.
It is your blatant turncoat behavior that must be addressed.
Mo, you'll use any excuse now to bash poor Marie.
You know you were "likin' it!" when she doll-danced her way into your heart. Now it's all: been there done that.
And don't tell me that Frankie S., the original old blue eyed devil, couldn't sing. I wouldn't cross him OR the Catholic Church (also afraid of Pope and his hat) were I you.
By way of Hollywood insider type info: I think the doll dance may have been influenced by Ginger Rogers' great hypnotized dance in a wonderful movie called "Carefree."
It appears to be the original doll dance and it is exquisite!
Kim Carnes at 7:10AM on Mar 21st 2008
13. Kim,
Don't forget those children who ring your doorbell, then run. Terrifying!
Actually, the "Doll Dance" was choreographed by famous Ballroom dancer & Lawrence Welk star Cissy King. Ms. King crafted the dance from recollections of her early adult life when she lived with her Uncle Bill. One day she caught the butler, Mr. French, engaged in a romantic tryst with Mrs. Beasley, her sister's precocious doll. Mr. French explained that they were merely "dancing."
Mr. French, incidentally, belonged to the Church of England.
JG^^
John Giza at 7:45AM on Mar 21st 2008
14. Aw Kim,
Guess I'm preaching to the choir:
"Her hair is Harlowe gold
Her lips sweet suprise
Her hands are never cold
She's got Mrs. Beasley eyes...
She's precocious and she knows just
what it takes to make the help blush..."
I need a cigarette.
JG^^
John Giza at 8:59AM on Mar 21st 2008
15. Hello Mo Rocka:
Your Comments on Is Mormons better then other Christians!! I think all us Christians have beautiful Voices!! I Have been in Choirs most of my life and I have a beautiful voice as well as My Co Choir Member friends at the Morrison Heights Bapists Church!! We are now singing our Easter Services and Easter! Wish you could here us sing!! We are at www.morrisonheightschurch.org and for Comments on The Osmonds??? They have been the Best singers in the World today!! I am glad they hit there 50th Anniversary!! Horray for The Mormons!!
Valynn at 10:28AM on Mar 21st 2008