 David Archuleta |
 Brooke White |
On Wednesday night's American Idol results show, something extraordinary happened: The first of the Top Ten finalists announced was tiger beat boy David Archuleta. The second was the group's "Mommy" Brooke White.
So for at least a few minutes 100% of the confirmed finalists were Mormons. Think about that.
This day was a day that was never supposed to come. Indeed for the first few seasons of Idol the idea of an openly Mormon Top Ten finalist was simply unfathomable. (Statistics on Mormon Idol contestants are famously unreliable.) Clearly times have changed. Is this a belated validation of the strides made by the Mitt Romney candidacy? Perhaps. Although the Republican ex-Governor's campaign failed, he forced Americans to come to terms with their anti-LDS prejudices and emboldened Mormon voters (and singers?) to flex their muscle (and vocal cords?).
Whatever the ramifications of this explosion of out and proud LDS singers, the question must be asked: Are Mormons simply better at singing than other Christian denominations? The answer seems to be yes.
With 5.5 million church members in the U.S., they represent less than 2% of the population. And yet they're 20% of the Idol Top Ten. (Factor in the international scope of this year's competition - itself a controversy - and the LDS representation is even more impressive.) No other Christian denomination comes close.
The Osmonds, of course, are the best example of what critics call the "Mormon Melody Mafia." Out of nine children born to George and Olive Osmond, seven (a whopping 77%) are gifted singers. The other two, Virl and Tom, are deaf. Yet even they appreciate music, having appeared on The Donnie and Marie Christmas Special in 1978.
So why are Mormons such good singers?
- They don't smoke. (I love Bonnie Tyler as much as anyone, but raspy-voiced singers spend their careers swimming upstream.)
- They don't drink alcohol or caffeine.
- They have large families that sing together at home and in tabernacle choirs. On a trip to Salt Lake City in 1999 I had the great pleasure of sitting through a rehearsal of the Mormon Tabernacle Choir. The acoustics: astonishing. The organ: 11,623 pipes. The experience: unforgettable. One of my favorite cds remains the choir singing civil war hymns.
- They live at high altitudes. Because they're used to thin air, their breath control is unrivaled. (Whether that gives them an unfair advantage at sea level is another matter.)
- They don't dance.
(That Marie Osmond could put one foot in front of the other on Dancing with the Stars was a miracle. Of course it would have helped had she practiced more and shrieked about her doll collection less.)
Not surprisingly the first of the Top Twelve finalists eliminated was lap-dancer David Hernandez. (Lap-dancing is strictly forbidden in Utah, with two exceptions: the Olympic village in 2002 was granted dispensation. Plus there's a club in Provo that sells membership cards for lap-dancing.) I liked David Hernandez but I suspect he would have sounded better had he not spread himself so thin.
So what do you think? Why are Mormons so much better than other Christians at singing?
***
HELP WANTED:
- I'm still looking for material for my cabaret show featuring music about states. Specifically I'm looking for a recording of - or even just sheet music for - the early 20th century song "When it's Apple Blossom Time in Orange, New Jersey, we'll make a Peach of a Pair." (I realize that this is more about fruit than New Jersey, but it sounds like a winner.) Also has anyone heard Steve Allen's song "Spring in Maine"? Is it any good?
- Is anyone reading involved in planning a 200th birthday celebration for Abraham Lincoln? I'm a huge Lincoln lover and want to get involved. I emailed historian Richard Norton Smith at George Mason University, but he hasn't responded. (He once gave me a private tour of the Lincoln Museum in Springfield, so I'm guessing he's just been busy. Or maybe he's still sore at my Mary Todd Lincoln wisecracks.)
Reader Comments ( Page 5 of 5)
61. What a fruitful discussion! Thanks, everyone, for chiming in.
Thanks also, JG, for the links re: that New Jersey song. I really appreciate it.
Mo Rocca at 12:18AM on Mar 24th 2008
62. Aw Mo,
Thank you. I really hope I am wrong. You know that song "If I said you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me" was made off a one line joke song. Maybe there is a version of the song you are looking for out there.
If it isn't, I truly hope you would consider putting it up to a contest. Why, we Roccats can do almost anything. Christ, Andrea alone has more I.Q. points than three of the R&R associates put together. And then you add in Finn?
And I don't ask for much. Okay, the three black helicopters and 35 retired special forces vets to rescue Crafty from Mt. Desert Isle might have gone over the top, but usually I don't.
But if you do offer Crafty as a prize, I hope it would be the original Crafty. If not, then I hope it would be his twin brother made with care by your loving hands and not just a box with pine cones, pipe cleaners, Gorilla glue and a ten page set of instructions in three different languages.
I hope you had a happy Easter.
JG
John Giza at 1:43AM on Mar 24th 2008
63. No moron,
They block vote for their own people.
Hillsong Church does the same thing for Idol in Australia.
Democracy does not equate to supremacy. It is easy for interest groups to over represent their opinion.
Ever hear of the concept of a lobby group.
Pero at 8:45PM on Mar 25th 2008
64. It is true Mormons can sing and dance and are good at everything else. They are disproportionately represented in the realm of medicine, law, politics, Hollywood, etc. As a recent convert to the church I have a theory to explain the phenomenon. Mormon Parents. Many Mormon parents put their kids from a very young age into voice, dance, piano, and all sorts of other classes to encourage the development of talents. Mormons aren’t better they are just more practiced. Thanks for the fun post and visiting Utah County Mo!
David at 8:22PM on Mar 25th 2008
65. Dear Mo,
I love it, I have never laughed so hard in all my life.
The truth is Mormons succeed in a lot of areas. Mormons push thier kids to "develop thier talents".
Sometimes I feel bad for the little angels because I think some of the kids are pushed a little to hard. Mormons take this talent development very seriously. Thier view: Talents are God given and we his humans should use our talents to glorify God.
Thanks for making me laugh... You Rock!
Christine at 10:49AM on Mar 26th 2008
66. Mormons can't dance... which is why BYU has one of the best ballroom dance departments in the country and has hosted the national DanceSport competition for years before Dancing With the Stars was even a twinkle in a producer's eye. *nod* Seriously, all the big high schools in Utah have ballroom dance programs - how many schools outside of Utah can say the same thing?
Duerma at 12:24PM on Mar 26th 2008
67. Not all mormons live in high altitudes. Some of us live below sea level. I, too, greatly disagree with the comment that mormons can't dance. (Cuz, honey, you obviously haven't seen me get after it!!!!) :)
ELBR at 9:33AM on Mar 28th 2008
68. I know my comment is a little delayed (I'm behind on my reading), but I would have to say that people in the Church of Christ are the best musicians from top to bottom. No drinking, no smoking, no dancing (all the qualifications you listed for Mormons), plus we don't use instrumental music so that means everyone sings everything in at least 4 part harmony. That makes for a very talented group of people.
Jennifer at 9:36AM on Mar 29th 2008
69. Mo:
Hope I'm not too late to help you in your quest for state songs!
The Apple Blossom NJ song you seek appears on Kim Wallach's (1985) album, "Paddle on the Rahway," which can be purchased for $15 through this link:
http://www.kimwallach.com/recordings.html
Also, here is an interesting article that cites many potential New Jersey Songs:
http://veryseldom.com/Reviews/StateSongPlan.php
But, please don't forget about Al Alberts' "On the Way to Cape May":
http://tendermelody.imeem.com/music/XaccAic5/al_alberts_on_the_way_to_cape_may/
Best of luck and please let me know if I can help you with any other state song research.
Rock on, Mo!
- Lisa R.
Lisa R. at 9:08PM on Mar 31st 2008
70. Yeah, mormons totally dance! We (mormons) grow up with youth activites where they teach you the two-step and jive, only to name a few. Big bands play at lot of the dances. Maybe people think we don't dance cuz we're not big into dance clubs/bars. That's mostly because of the atmosphere. And some dancing we would deem as being innappropriate, or too "suggestive". But most of us love to dance. When I was single, there were LDS Singles dances every other weekend! Anyways, that's my two cents.
Tracy at 11:03AM on May 15th 2008
71. Look I was born and raised in the LDS church. I am no longer active at this point in my life, I just don't feel like I need a religious experience every week. I can't dance to save my life and sing like a sick grizzly bear. Yet my sister and her daughter are amazing singers and I saw my niece dancing up quite a storm at her own wedding.
And sure the Mormon beliefs may differ from other Christian religions but so does Catholosism, Presbiterian,Lutherans, etc. Each have differing opinions about true Christianity. However they all have similarities in the basic Christian principles. Love, honesty, following the Ten Commandments, etc.
By the way the church only suggests you don't partake of caffinated beverages. I am a personal fan of Mountain Dew AKA "The Nectar of The Gods" LOL.
Come on folks, I think it's time to lighten up. Mo wrote his article to be opinionated and entertaining. Just because you may not agree with his opinions or those of some commenters, shouldn't lead to the kind of personal attacks I have read here. I am a gun owner and can honestly say for me sending a piece of copper and lead 500 yards downrange and hitting a tiny 2-3 inch spot on a paper target is somewhat of a religious experience for me, as much as some others might feel sitting in church on Sunday.
Well(There's a deep subject!) that's my two 1/2 cents worth. Live, sing, dance, love and watch yourself in the mirror and most importantly laugh at yourself when you do!
Dan L at 6:23PM on Oct 24th 2008
72. David Osmond is auditioned for American Idol in Salt Lake City. We should see him on TV in the next week or two. Check out www.davidosmondidol.com
David at 4:36PM on Jan 13th 2009
73. Watch David Osmond on American Idol tonight. If you miss his audition. Check out www.davidosmondidol.com
David at 10:25AM on Feb 23rd 2009