I confess that I'd never even heard of Iron Man when producer Anthony Laudato approached me about the project. I assumed this was his own private obsession. (Anthony is such a robot fanatic, he's on the steering committee of the National Robot Museum, set to open in Landover, MD in 2011. And no, I'm not purchasing a ticket to their "steel tie" gala fundraiser.) But once I began reading about Tony Stark, Iron Man's womanizing, hard-drinking genius inventor, I was hooked.
The real-life exoskeleton is named XOS and is the brainchild of Dr. Stephen Jacobson's team at Raytheon Sarcos in Salt Lake City. Jacobson is the man behind the Utah artificial arm, created in 1983 and still the standard for casualties of war. XOS is being developed for commercial, medical and military purposes. (One intriguing goal is for XOS to be used by medical personnel to help move patients.) What was most extraordinary to me was the near instantaneous reaction of the suit to the user's movements -- i.e., if the guy inside of it moved his right arm upward ever so slightly, XOS moved right with it. (One problem with XOS's various predecessors is that the exoskeleton would take more than a split second to follow along, thus creating a drag effect that exhausts the user ... and defeats much of the purpose.)
Here is a photo from the shoot:
Mercy!
***
Readers of this blog know that I am a long-time fan of Mormon singing. So the ouster of golden-voiced songstress Brooke White from American Idol last week was both shocking -- and clear evidence of prejudice. Had she remained in the competition, a staggering 50% of the remaining contestants would be LDS members. Surprising, yes. But so what? Every great American show tune composer, with the exception of Cole Porter, has been Jewish. And I wouldn't sacrifice one bar of Gershwin, Kern, Berlin, Rodgers, Loesser or Sondheim in some wrongheaded attempt to "spread the wealth."
Whether or not the elimination of Brooke White qualifies as a hate crime is something for lawyers to sort out. The producers of American Idol should sigh relief that Mormons tend to be less litigious than other Christian denominations. (They're too busy singing and trying to improve their dancing.)
In any case, my trip to Salt Lake City to report on XOS meant a stay at the hip Hotel Monaco. I'd stayed there before and really didn't notice the personnel. But this time, I couldn't help but notice something peculiar: Every employee's name tag had a mysterious designation right below their names. The spiky-haired blond desk clerk's tag read "Brian," with "Sponge Bob" written on a second line. His colleague's tag read "Whitney," with "Purple" just below it. (My producer Anthony is terrified of the color purple. He pretended not to hear her when she offered to check him in and instead waited for Brian.)
What were these special inscriptions? Were they nicknames? Biblical citations? Second Life avatars? My initial instinct was simply not to ask. I'm sensitive to all religious traditions. And many of my dearest Utah friends are still reeling from the Utah War, the bloody conflict between federal authorities and the Mormon militia that ended in July 1858. (If anyone knows of sesquicentennial celebrations for the end of the Utah War, please write. We'd all like to know!)
But I also knew that not asking might constitute a sin of omission. What if the employees were members of a cell, communicating through their own secret language of name tag code? I wanted to ask Chelsie (alias: "Coca-Cola"), but she looked terrified when I glanced at her tag. Was Chelsie strapped to a bomb against her will? Set to detonate when I got too nosy?
Finally I asked Buddy, the valet (alias: "Love").
"They're our guilty pleasures," he said. "They show another side of us."
Love is a guilty pleasure? Huh? I understood how Chelsie's Coke habit constituted a guilty pleasure, what with the Mormon prohibition against caffeine.
"Did these have to be approved?" I asked. "I imagine some were too racy."
"Oh, yeah," said Buddy. "Jake's guilty pleasure was cougars," he said referring to women who like men 10 years younger. "That wasn't going to fly. He managed to get 'cougar' singular put on his tag. But the boss was still bothered."
So what did Jake (another valet) end up with?
"Tulips," said Buddy.
Is it just me, or does "Tulips" sound dirtier than "Cougars"?
Reader Comments ( Page 1 of 1)
1. Dear Mo Rocca,
A "tulip" is drug slang for a specific type of marijuana joint. It's difficult to roll them as they have a little sack at their ends where the majority of the marijuana is placed, resembling a tulip to some extent. Now maybe that Mormon valet there just likes flowers but there’s a good chance he loves to get high.
Your friend,
Blayze
Blayze at 8:04PM on May 4th 2008
2. Guys, do not try and read Mo's post while multitasking! Mo's posts require your undivided attention. I had to come back and read the post again, just so I could get most of Mo's jokes.
So happy for Mr. Lee (Love him!) on another box office hit! And also, kudos to Dr. Jacobson and his team!
As for the "guilty pleasure" name tags, "Tulips" sounds sexier to me, not necessarily dirtier than "Cougars".
BTW, babe, I just heard on 60 Minutes from Mr. Rooney that Mr. Mike Wallace is turning 90 years old!!! God Bless him! Please make sure you give him a smooch from me.
giftedgirl at 8:08PM on May 4th 2008
3. Blayze, sweetie, thanks for the info.
I thought "Tulips" was code for having two lips, as in a sexy mouth, like my Mo's!
giftedgirl-still high as a kite! at 8:16PM on May 4th 2008
4. Okay, I just looked up "tulip" on the Urban Dictionary website, and now I'm going to go hide.
Betcha Karl is out there laughing his ass off!
G.G.-embarrassed as hell. at 9:45PM on May 4th 2008
5.
I always thought Tulips were slang for my first girl....
What's better than four roses on a piano....TULIPS, on my organ
mac at 10:54PM on May 4th 2008
6. Sorry, but I'm having a hard time letting this go. First, you spell God with a lower case "g" (Shoelaces Aren't for Tying). You're Catholic for Heaven's sake!
Then you make fun of women who happen to be going through an excrutiating time in their lives.
Now, the "tulips" thing.
What the hell?!
Where is the gentleman that I admire and respect? I don't know whether you're testing your fans or if you're really on some kind of self-destructive path. How many times are we supposed to give you the benefit of the doubt?
And no, I'm not a prude or a pollyanna. Of course, I know that you're not perfect and I don't expect you to be. But you know better, Mo.
giftedgirl at 1:45AM on May 5th 2008
7. Good Morning Mo,
Thanks for posting the picture plus comic- bookesque caption, "Mercy!" on the blog...I missed CBS Sunday Morning...double darn.
The applications for the XOS really are intriguing-
MAN, I want to try it out....
of all the name tag aliases, I liked Buddy "Love".
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JFfOOXPBigY&feature=related
p.s. G.G. if you are over 25, the definitions held within the "urban dictionary" will fry off your eyebrows....be very careful! Mo's definition doesn't necessarily have to match with U.D.'s ...:)
ah, Clem at 5:58AM on May 5th 2008
8. Mo- I enjoyed watching you “fight” and “play catch” with the Iron Man robot (I see CBS has now posted the video online); I’m sure that weightlifters, breakdancers and moving men everywhere are getting their resumes together. After all, in fifty years the clean and jerk lifts and the pop-and-lock dance moves will be met with blank stares as they will be completely obsolete and have no significance whatsoever! I suppose barbells, handtrucks and dollies will still have value--provided they’re made of metal and can be sold at a scrap yard. (Then again, maybe the moving men should be looking into how much the Iron Man would be worth at a scrap yard…)
I’m glad I’m not an employee of that hotel because they would be constantly running out of name tags for me to list all my guilty pleasures!
SGS at 8:54AM on May 5th 2008
9. Aw Mo,
This is all starting to come together now.
The Utah Arm was the first domino to fall in the evolution of Skynet.
Now we have “Iron Man.”
What exactly did happen on Michael Jackson’s 40th (39th) birthday and why is the Government covering it up?
Given the predicament of Linda Hamilton and Bridget Moynahan, I am reminded of William Congreve’s warning “Heaven has no rage like love to hatred turned/ Nor hell a fury like a woman scorned.”
Which dovetails into the expulsion of Brooke White from American Idol. (Doesn’t that title sound a bit robotic?). All of the contestants have seemed a bit “manufactured.” “Mechanical nightingales for Emperor Simon,” as Tom Gliatto referred to them in May 12 “People” (pg.45.)
Now, I have nothing against David Archuletta, who I find to be Neil Diamond in the smooth. But given the fact that he is from Utah and working for Ford Motors scares me a little like purple.
Which brings me to Jake, (and what is the Urban Dictionary’s definition for that?). I think Jake is just a disgruntled employee who is looking to employ a little shock and awe to discredit his overbearing boss. Although, Kudos to Buddy for producing the memorable line “When Cougars fly.”
And on no related noted to the above Robot conspiracy theory, did anyone notice how Blayze’s comment just rolled off his tongue. I don’t think he has even heard of the “Urban Dictionary.”
And now, I’ll leave you with a little song from my stay at the Hotel Monaco:
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=i_XT7zDuuZg
JG^^
John Giza at 12:47PM on May 5th 2008
10. Tulips are beautiful flowers that originated in Asia and have become a trademark in Holland.
Mo, you should totally come out to our 72nd annual Tulip Festival in Orange City, Iowa! http://octulipfestival.com/images/FestivalHistory.pdf
Natalie at 2:54PM on May 5th 2008
11. Blayze- I would have never thought of looking up those cryptic name tags in the the Urban Dictionary! Having just read the entries for "purple" and "Sponge Bob", I think you might be on to something (or…on something?)
Kidding…kidding… ;D
Mo- Did you happen to notice if any employees had the word "colitas" under their name? (or, um, maybe that's a different hotel...)
Everyone please forgive me for not being up on the drug lingo--just sign me up as a member of the NBBC!
SGS at 3:08PM on May 5th 2008
12. Quiet guys.. I'm totally an avid pot smoker. I don't need that urbandictionary nonsense.
Blayze at 6:30PM on May 5th 2008
13. Hotel Monaco is not known for its LDS church affiliated employees. SLC is only about 40% LDS anyway and shi shi hotels aren't exactly a big draw as an employer among those trying to tow the line. So it isn't likely that more than a few of the employees there were Mormons to begin with.
colinalcarz at 6:47PM on May 5th 2008
14. Wow...I dated a man 15 years younger...what would that make me? Oh, yeah...old. Nevermind.
The Booka at 4:09PM on May 6th 2008