It's that time of year again: cue the obligatory anti-fireworks article in every local newspaper. Some are totally justified. Governor Schwarzenegger is right to tell Californians not to use consumer fireworks this year because of how dry it is out there and how many fires they've had to fight already this year. And the National Council on Fireworks Safety is right to offer helpful hints about how to shoot off fireworks safely. (We enjoyed their video starring a suburban Philip Seymour Hoffman lookalike.)
But all the articles nit-picking about, say, the environmental impact of bottle rockets, such as this advice column on Salon.com, seem like buzz-killing at its most extreme. The latter's suggestion:
So what's a good 4th of July celebrant to do? You could seek out a laser show, which is likely to be choreographed to music (think Pink Floyd) more spectacularly than your hometown fireworks display, aside, that is, from the Boston Pops performance of the 1812 Overture at the Charles River Esplanade. Sure, you will miss the diaphragm-pounding explosions and the tickle of sulfur in your lungs, but at least you will be doing the climate a favor.
Yeah, and be sure to eat carob brownies instead of chocolate and drink sparkling apple cider instead of champagne. Please excuse us while we light off a few screamers in protest.
Happy Fourth of July, everyone!




Reader Comments ( Page 1 of 2)
1. I have no issue with fireworks - certainly not ones put on in professional displays. But when drunk neighbors are firing them off over everyone's roofs, that is another story.
David S. at 9:18AM on Jul 4th 2008
2. I like the fireworks display put on by the town or county. I went to a laser light show on the Fourth of July a few years back and it reminded me of 1980's disco.
Willet at 5:50PM on Jul 4th 2008
3. Of course there was the time Old Man Boswick fell asleep with a cig going in his living room. Would'd been okay but he had the entire inventory of his firework stand in there and,Boy, when it went up it about blew my 9 year old mind...took the better part of half an hour to totally cook off...kinda sad it burned his house to the waterline and he later killed himself but it was something the nieghborhood kids never forgot..
Lawrence Phoenix at 6:12PM on Jul 4th 2008
4. I'd like to have a peaceful holiday, but as usual, there are neighbors out (including a lot of unsupervised kids) who will probably keep setting off fireworks until about 2:00 a.m. Why do some people have to disturb everybody else with their childish racket in order to have a good time?
steve1251 at 9:58PM on Jul 4th 2008
5. Sorry, Ada, have to disagree with you on this one. As I write this, fireworks are going off in my neighborhood, and I hate them. People are nuts to put themselves at risk by using them. And I would have to think that there is a legitimate environmental impact, although the danger issue is more pressing, I concede. It's too bad the police don't care.
Steve at 9:58PM on Jul 4th 2008
6. fireworks are illegal in the great state of georgia...forget drug lords and child rapists and murderers...someone might be taking part in joyful, innocent glee!
police officers make it a point to patrol in neighborhoods all day the 4th, just to discourage any action. forget the drunk drivers, we need to protect and serve in cul-de-sacs.
hannah at 11:26AM on Jul 5th 2008
7. i'm one of those ppl who can't stand fireworks unless they're done by professionals and accompanied by big bands playing patriotic music. at least then, i know my chances of getting hurt or losing a piece of my personal property to a fireworks mishap is VERY small to NON EXSISTANT. and i like that. i grew up in kcmo and now live in nc. both places have issues with fireworks but NO ONE does anything about it. in kc, they were "banned" in the city limits. if you got out of the metro area and for good measure, out of the county, you were ok. by then you were in rural areas where chances of your hurting someone or doing serious property damage were pretty small. but did anyone care or inforce the rules? NOPE! and in nc, we're under a severe drought and have been for a few years. but there are still fireworks being sold. ppl are just "encouraged" to use commone sense. yeah, and bud light is on sale, too. how much you want to bet that fireworks + beer does NOT equal common sense? my husband has some friends from colorado. they banned fireworks sales out right there a few years back b/c of their drought. i wish more states would exercise that option and police the ppl who do want to be amature pryotechnics masters. i'm so sick of hearing about the damage these things cause and ppl going, "if only..."
Devynn at 12:18PM on Jul 5th 2008
8. It's not the fireworks it's the "slobs" they attract which alienates me. Drunks, and their beer cans; kids and their candy wrappers; shitty diapers, obnoxious loud behavior into the wee hours. A clear display of the worst of our culture. I pack up and leave as I live onthe "site. The visual beauty doesn't EVEN offset the bad behavior and habits. And then there's the debris from the fireworks themselves. It takes weeks to recover.
KAR at 12:59PM on Jul 5th 2008
9. Good Lord, there are a lot of spoil-sports out there! Generally fireworks only go off once a year - 4th of July. Why be such a mamby-pamby complainer for one day a year? So there is a little noise. So what?
VS at 2:39PM on Jul 5th 2008
10. Happy Summer, Everyone!
At least it is happy for some people! I live in the town of Lakeville,Minnesota which is about a 1/2 hour drive to Minneapolis. This is where the huge fireworks display complete with music entertain thousands of people--young and old!
My problem is with the amateurs shooting off fireworks sold at the local grocery and drugstores for the entire summer long! Enough already! The huge noise scares the children and pets, as well. These amateurs play with their "toys" late into the night and early morning. Grow up already!
Jacqueline Anderson at 2:58PM on Jul 5th 2008
11. I would have no problem if the fireworks really were a once a year event in my neighborhood. However, they have become a regular party favor. The neighbors living behind me are fireworks addicts. They bring them out even in the winter. I get tired of the noise, smell and debris. VS if you enjoy them so much I invite you to come stay with me this summer. See how much fun it is to try to have a quite dinner on your patio while being bombarded by bottle rockets.
Amber at 3:19PM on Jul 5th 2008
12. When I was a kid, we used to shoot bottle rockets at each other- which was lots of fun. It's amazing how hard they hit since there's hardly any mass to them! Cans of hairspray added to the campfire is always fun too!
Mike at 3:55PM on Jul 5th 2008
13. It's amazing how many people are against fireworks and yet they don't mine at all if we blow the hell out of a innocent bunch Iraqis and Afghans. We live in a very strange country, beginning with our tightly controlled media.
gshort3011 at 4:15PM on Jul 5th 2008
14. All you need to do is talk to any firefighter to know why anyone with common sense hates fireworks. Parents hand their children a bunch of explosives and are then horrified when the little darlings blow their fingers off, blind themselves, or burn their innocent neighbors' homes down. My father, now a retired firefighter, would come home every year on the 5th, blackened with soot from putting out fires started by morons with bottle rockets, and depressed about all the calls they took for young children seriously injured by "safe and sane" sparklers and firecrackers. I watched my neighbor's kid set his own roof on fire with a bottle rocket, and then had them tell me I was crazy when I pointed out that fireworks were illegal in our county. Exactly the kind of idiot who thinks fireworks are soooo fun! Look up some of the statistics for your towns and cities to get a real grasp of just how many people are injured and how much property damaged and destroyed each year before you accuse people with common sense and concern for others of being "spoil sports" and having the wrong priorities.
Stacey at 11:58PM on Jul 5th 2008
15. I love fireworks, if done safely and sanely they are a wonderful time.
ObamaYourMama at 11:46AM on Jul 6th 2008