Madonna and Michael Moore are BFF, reports the AP, and were hanging out at the Traverse City Film Festival, where Madonna was showing her documentary about the AIDS crisis in Malawi, I Am Because We Are (trailer above; warning: unrelenting bleakness). Madonna said, "We need, I need, Michael Moore in my life."

Karin Badt's review of the movie on The Huffington Post suggests Moore might not be a positive influence on her:

Did playing Batman get to Christian Bale? As The Dark Knight breaks box-office records and positive reviews flow in, Reuters has an unseemly story about Bale's alleged off-set behavior.

The press is reporting that Bale was taken to a London police station and grilled about an assault charge made against him by his sister and mother. He has denied the charge, but the L.A. Times blog suggests the incident involved Bale's response to something said to his wife.

Little kids get kind of obsessed with the Feist song "1 2 3 4" (here's an example: the daughter of the band Mates of State performing her own version). So it's only fitting that Feist would take her act to the new season of Sesame Street, performing an extra- kid-friendly version of the song.

Siskel & Ebert was such an iconic show, and Ebert & Roeper seemed to do a pretty good job with the legacy, even with guests hosts during Ebert's health leaves.

But not, apparently, good enough for Disney-ABC, which is letting both critics leave the show next month. Ebert, who had been on the air for 33 years, says Disney wants to take the show in "a new direction."

How weird that the show isn't going off the air, it's just totally changing its cast and presumably its name?

Babble.com has up a list of the 26 most disturbing kid movies ever. Wow, did it bring back some terrifying memories. There are a few Disney movies on there, but one notable omission: The Fox and the Hound.

For my money, this is the hands-down most horrible children's film of all time. Themes: the death of parents and the inevitability that your best friend will one day try to kill you.

George Carlin died yesterday of heart failure at the age of 71. The great comedian, author of the legendary routine "Seven Words You Can Never Say On Television," will be missed. In his honor, here's a video of Carlin performing a routine about age in 1976. It's the only thing we could find without lots of cursing. There are some more explicit greatest hits here. And here's an interview Carlin did with Larry King when he was 64 in which he tells the age jokes from the above act and explains why he's not actually an atheist even though he doesn't believe in God.

Lauren Hutton, bless her crazy, crazy heart, is on another morning-show rampage. Three years ago, she went on the Early Show and blindsided the anchor with a bisexual confession. Here's our transcript of that exchange:

Hutton: "Governments everywhere are men, and it is ancient and insane and shameful."
Syler: "But let me-"
Hutton: "We've got to have half and half. That's how God made us, otherwise there's only one of us and probably us. But God knows we wouldn't have come up with bridges or airplanes or lots of stuff. You know, boys have great vision and they're fun in bed. But, so there's certain, fine things for them. It's true. I've been both places. I prefer men."

Now she goes on the Today Show and complains to Kathie Lee that men are all sluts (wha?) and that slutty gay men wrote Sex and the City (which is not exactly true . . . ) thereby encouraging women to be sluts too (um . . .). Here's the money quote:

Director Sydney Pollack died today at the age of 73 of cancer. He directed The Way We Were, Out of Africa and the brilliant Tootsie, a scene of which is posted above. In it, he plays the agent of Dustin Hoffman's character and delivers a line that should be a mantra for actors over-thinking silly roles:: "A tomato doesn't have logic!" He will be missed.

R&B artist Robert Kelly is currently on trial for allegedly engaging in sexual relations with an under-aged girl. A video released by the Chicago Sun-Times in February of 2002 displays a man who resembles R. Kelly taking part in vile sex acts with a 13 year old. Prosecutors finally played the tape for the jury, and reports claim the identity of the man on the tape is questionable. Watch the following video for more details on the R. Kelly tape scandal.
Watch TYT!

Steve Wilder of Omaha Nebraska woke up suffocating due to complications from throat cancer. The radiation treatments he received years ago resulted in scar tissue, which Wilder says left him with a "shrunken throat." But he decided to take matters into his own hands when he grabbed a steak knife and made a quarter-inch incision that saved his life. Watch the video for more details!

As stoner comedies go, Harold and Kumar go to White Castle was pretty successful, but now for the sequel they're getting . . . egad . . . political. Specifically, in Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay, they mock our age of terror, winding up in Gitmo after their bong is mistaken for a bomb.

Salon says it's "hilarious," and praises a scene in which the duo smokes up with a certain current president. There are a ton of enthusiastic spoilers in this Ain't It Cool News item. So apparently it's a totally legitimate, and maybe even good, parody.

But the whole idea of such a film is weird, right? Everyone seems to be acting like terrorism and torture are perfectly appropriate subjects for pothead comedies (everyone except the administration officials who argue that it's a perfectly lovely detention center).

Do you think it's good that silly comedies are tackling such intense subject matter? Will you go see it?

Rob Lowe, claiming he was threatened with blackmail by a former babysitter to his two sons, went on the offensive, publishing a screed against her yesterday on the Huffington Post. He even posts emails sent from the sitter's Blackberry. Here's some of what he says:

A former employee is demanding my wife Sheryl and I pay her $1.5 million by the end of the week or she will accuse us both of a vicious laundry list of false terribles. It is an attempt to damage and humiliate not only my wife and me, but our two young sons as well. My family is devastated at this betrayal; this woman worked in our home and traveled with us off and on for seven years, without complaint.

By Jayar Jackson

Arizona Cardinals quarterback Matt Leinart may have finally gotten himself in some trouble over his much publicized partying ways. Pictures have surfaced on the internet of the USC alum and Heisman Trophy winner partying at his house in Arizona with his roll dog Nick Lachey and several women. Red cups and beer bongs decorate the background...and foreground of the photos, with the two guys looking like regular frat boys having a good time with friends.

Now that the embarrassing pictures are making their rounds throughout everyone's inboxes and "check this out" pages, the Cardinals head coach, Ken Whisenhunt told reporters that although Leinart warned him of the images before they surfaced, he was still upset over them. "We obviously reinforced there's a standard we hold all our players to that we expect them to keep. I'm obviously disappointed that those pictures showed up."

It's obvious that Whisenhunt had no choice but to deliver comments that show disappointment in his 24 year-old quarterback, since so many people in this country scour the gossip pages for a new way to correct someone other than themselves. The coach has the organization that he works for to protect, he has to cater to the ultra-sensitive fans that still actually expect professional athletes to stop being human and be role models for their children.

If you look closely, you'll see that Whisenhunt said he's disappointed that the pictures showed up, NOT that Leinart was partying in the off-season with beers and women. He understands that Leinart is a party guy and that a majority of professional athletes do the same type of thing. If you still think that these grown men with ridiculous paychecks are living the life of a priest...bad example...the life of a Doug Christie or an A.C Green, you're living in a fantasy world.

Now, it's been rumored that these girls are under the legal age for drinking. If this is the case, Mr. Leinart has an entirely different problem on his hands. So far, the proof to this includes the always reputable comments left on gossip sites saying that they know the girls and their graduating year, and fool-proof myspace pages that do nothing but tell the truth. Once some real proof comes to the light, that condemnation...and criminal charges will come right along with it.

Some argue that this unproven golden boy doesn't have time to play around like this, off-season or not. His pedestrian numbers on the field, his battle back and forth with the antique Kurt Warner for the starting position, and ultimate collarbone injury last season gives much credence to this case. After staying around for a 5^th year at USC after winning a National Championship, many questioned his commitment to football over partying. He just may end up being a bust due to his apparent lack of dedication. To this I say...who cares? Are you his parents? If he wants to ruin his career before it gets started, why does it have you punching walls?

We don't even know that his partying in the off-season like so many others is his problem. Many fans can't get enough of the iconic image of Joe Namath jogging off the field with one finger in the air after winning Super Bowl III, but if his partying ways were documented back then the way Leinart's are now, the same nosey people would be in his business, calling him a sure failure. The only obsession left that makes this everyday ordeal so personal to some is that they wish they were in his shoes. I hate to point out such an ugly truth, but jealousy is not very becoming.

This week's Bad Parent column on Babble is written by Jeanne Sager, whose daughter sometimes watches six or more hours a day of television.

Jeanne confesses: The truth is, I'm not crazy about all the TV watching in my house - whether it's Jillian or my husband in front of the screen. But I sacrifice to the TV gods in exchange for a work-from-home job, one that lets me spend more time with my daughter but requires me to offer her a smaller piece of my attention during the day.

Also on Babble this week: a comprehensive and quite funny dispatch about toddler TV. The author, L.J. Williamson, even manages to get a doctor at the AAP to clarify their famous "no TV under two" recommendation. Those of us whose kids watch an hour or so of "Big Bird in China" each day may find the doctor's response akin to religious absolution: