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Wake Up, America!

By David Knowles
Feb 8th 2008 9:29AM

Filed Under:eDemocrats, Republicans, Featured Stories, Humor

If you ever find yourself dipping your toes into the turbulent waters of any political blog's comment section, you're sure to notice a commonly held belief among Americans. A great swath of the country, it is claimed, is sleepwalking its way through life. People from across the political spectrum seem have simultaneously discovered this phenomenon, and are yelling at the top of their lungs (often in all capital letters and invariably followed by a string of exclamation marks) WAKE UP, AMERICA!!!!

What's really interesting about the entreaty to open one's eyes and see the world the way it really is, is that it's usually coupled with a factual inaccuracy (or several) of its own.

For example, to Matt Singer's recent piece about Superdelegates, a Clinton supporter wrote,

"And now we are to believe that with the economy in the toilet that Obama has raised 8 million in a matter of days from the average joe american?? I think what you men to say is from his buddy Oprah the great who has more money than GOD and won't miss 8 million!! PEOPLE WAKE UP!!!"

The media, too, are often accused of dosing your drink with sleeping pills. The supporter of any candidate that is lagging in polls are most likely to alert us to this situation, as one grammatically challenged Ron Paul supporter recently obliged on AOL's straw poll thread:

"Wake up, folks. don't let the media fool you into beleiving that there are only few liars to elect. Ron Paul is only real choice."

Religious zealots are also fond of playing the alarm clock role, as a Republican woman recently did on my post about Hillary's recent loan:

"Wake up America!! Don't you see what is happening? You who are Christians and know your scriptures are aware that in the last days the Antichrist will come into power and deceive many."

The narrative of awakening into a clear understanding of the state of the world while others around you continue to be deceived is as old as human history itself. Literature throughout the ages is filled with tales of selective enlightenment. From the Dhammapada, to the Bible, to 1984 and The Matrix, human beings are positively addicted to the dystopian notion of an elusive truth that lies just beyond the grasp of the masses.

In our current political climate, it seems that every selective demographic has risen just in the nick of time to try and stir the rest of us before it's too late. We are warned to WAKE UP because the Jews are running the country. To WAKE UP before Iran destroys us with nuclear weapons. WAKE UP before global warming overtakes the planet. WAKE UP before the United States becomes a Godless haven. WAKE UP before the illegal aliens take over.

All this damn waking up is making me incredibly sleepy.

If only the chosen few had a way to pierce through the armor of slumber that encases the rest of the population. Wait, I've got it. Quick, Truthseers, get to the comment section, and try leaving your next message in CAPITAL, BOLD, and ITALIC LETTERS. That should do the trick.

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