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The Bushes and the Moons
George W. Bush's seven years in the White House have fueled all kinds of terrible, paranoid conspiracies -- and the greatest, weirdest Bush Conspiracy is the "Exile To Paraguay" tale.The story goes like this: George W. Bush and/or George H.W. Bush bought hundreds of thousands of acres in Paraguay, adjoining a similar spread owned by the Unification Church's Rev. Sun Myung Moon. Both massive parcels are hidden within a remote South American wilderness atop the world's biggest freshwater aquifer adjoining a secret U.S. military airbase. Oh, and there's a special non-extradition law to protect the Bush/Moon families as they enjoy their old age and run drug/weapons smuggling rings, safe from American justice. And they'll own all the drinking water in the world, or something.
So when George W.'s scandal-plagued little brother Neil Bush rushes down to Paraguay to meet with Rev. Moon's secret cabal, as happened Thursday, even the professional skeptic can be forgiven for wondering just what is up with these people.
Plenty of Bush Family conspiracy theories are entirely real, such as Poppy Bush's repeated calls for the "New World Order." Bush 41 just meant a post-Cold War cooperation of nations, but millions of paranoid Americans interpreted this as proof of the Evil Globalist Regime that will force your dogs to get microchips and sell America to the European bankers. (These conspiracists are completely off base: The government wants your horses microchipped, and America was sold to Chinese bankers.)
Most of the more ordinary Bush 43 conspiracies have already been proven depressingly real, too, like the faked WMD "intelligence" before the invasion of Iraq, the White House plot to fire Justice Department attorneys for political reasons, and Dick Cheney's cozy secret dealings with the Oil Companies.
A truly fun conspiracy theory needs bizarre characters and indecipherable motives. That's what's so great about the "Exile To Paraguay" story, which has been floating around the Internet ever since a Cuban new
s service posted South American gossip about the Bush Family's massive Paraguayan land grab.It starts with former President George H.W. Bush's very cozy relationship with the cult leader Sun Myung Moon, who owns two influential conservative news organizations in Washington -- the Washington Times and United Press International. Some of the Rev. Moon's many mysterious businesses and foundations are based in South America, including Paraguay. And G.H.W. Bush has been happy to shill for Moon on a South American jaunt in 1996. The elder George Bush and wife Barbara Bush even sang Happy Birthday to the Mrs. Rev. Moon and helped blow out the candles. (Moon's bizarre Washington and international dealings are detailed in Bad Moon Rising, a new book by investigative journalist John Gorenfeld.)
Fired Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld may have ignited the strange legend when South American media learned of his August 2005 visit to a massive jungle air base in northern Paraguay. The conspiracy got even more traction when First Twin Jenna Bush suddenly turned up in Paraguay -- a year later, in October 2006 -- to hold secret meetings with the U.S. ambassador and the Paraguayan president. The U.S. Department of State actually refuted the Bush-Paraguay conspiracy, which just made it all the more real. Of course they would deny it.
And now we find out that the Bush Family's corrupt little brother was just in Paraguay, with the Rev. Moon's Universal Peace Federation. Neil Bush is the Bush that's usually kept in the shadows. Ever since he helped cause the massive Savings & Loan collapse -- the same S&L corruption scandal that nearly ended John McCain's political career two decades ago -- Neil Bush has kept busy with myriad crooked schemes to make money off the family name.
What was he doing with the Moonies in Paraguay? Conspiracists will be thrilled to learn that he spoke at some seminar titled "Toward a New Paradigm of Leadership and Government in Times of World Crisis."
Recent Comments
(Page 1 of 1)Martija Alex10:54AMMar 3rd 2008
He Ken,
No person of conscience can agree with so many of the Bush administration ways of "salvation" As far I know even Rev. Moon disagrees with the brutality the United States of North America is making peace in the world.
But...I am sorry, you whirling with information, prejudices, non sayings (like Moon hm...) The US is not lessening to The Rev. Moon, other ways the Iraky people would be treated with dignity and so the world. Since I think you are from the Bush country let my say that not only an single administration is to blame. The USNA has to regain his lost dignity, since they are pretending to be world leaders but doing bad.
I am a peace loving Bask who identifies myself with the ideals of the Universal Peace Federation created by the Rev. Moon. Even I do believe that the Basks should have their own country, so should the people of the world enjoy liberty and peace.
Your article wants to make believe something……I cannot agree. Please, don’t compare and put together what cannot be.
Since you know better than me how to write and you are great I wish you all best in your field,
Alexander Martija
Dang5:39PMMar 3rd 2008
Right-wing mafia, meet whacko religious cult. Oh, I see, you`ve already been in bed together for over a decade...how nice.
Tom7:44PMMar 3rd 2008
So, maybe they have business to do there. What's the big deal? Shouldn't anyone of any religious affiliation do business with another entity? I don't see why this has to be made into such a huge issue. Are the Moonies militant? Are they violent? Have they killed anyone? Which religion does not try to gain influence? As far as I know these people promote family values and are in general very nice people.
I have a strong feeling that you are discriminating against their religion and freedom to do business tying it up with a conspiracy theory. Why won't you let them do business in a poor country and bring economic prosperity to a nation that is in much need of such investment?
Tom
Cambridge, MA
Southern Beale10:07PMMar 3rd 2008
This is old news to a lot of us who raised alarm about all the Moonies getting jobs at the Office of Faith-Based Initiatives like, for instance, David Caprara, one of Moon’s top political players, who was put in charge of the whole operation.
Your tax dollars at work, supporting an abusive cult run by an ex-felon.
John K. Riggs7:40AMMar 11th 2008
Old nazis never die, they retire to south america. Could it be the next Bush president is preparing a new one world religion? Perhaps dubya wants to live closer to his coke supply in Columbia. The Bush syndicate has probably looted enough cash to buy the whole nation of Paraguay. The new colonialists, or might makes right.
Drew12:05PMMar 13th 2008
John K. Riggs:
Please read what you wrote. Read it again. Now feel sorry that you share space in this world with other people because what you wrote is very ignorant.
Oh, and for the umpteenth time, it's ColOmbia, not Columbia.
god1:41AMMar 16th 2008
Drew: Please read what you wrote and realize that you're an ignorant a-hole...it's common knowledge that the Bushes are Nazi collaborators and made a fortune financing the Nazi war machine into the 1940's after the US was at war with Germany...it's also know that they are financed by the Most Rev. Moon and his fascist cult of zombies...but of course if you weren't an ignorant a-hole you'd know all of this, ya dumbfuck?!
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white spiderman2:34AMMar 3rd 2008
The bushys and the moonies, nice combo cult. Maybe they can all take turns mooning each other and with the world's greatest aqua there, they all can take turns waterboarding. When sharp-shooter Cheney visits they can all take turns shooting images of a Demo. And, dodging Cheney's bullets. George Jr. wasn't the sharpest tack in Cheney's box and if he gets on the sauce and draws a blank he may imagine that Cheney has weapons of mass destruction and declare war on the Moons.