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Florida Kicks 'Truck-Nutz'
Welcome to Florida! In our magical playground, there's no state income tax, the overheated real estate market has gone into deep freeze, and a $2.1 billion-dollar budget deficit threatens to deprive local cities and towns of essential services. It is before this Disney-esque backdrop that the Florida Legislature toils day and night, doing the people's work. Last Friday, for instance, a pressing issue came before the governing body that could be ignored no longer. The state needed a yes or no answer: Truck Nutz, should they be banned?OK, I know many readers may never heard this term, much less laid eyes on said nutz. As a result of the confusion, some of you might be feeling the outrage starting to simmer. Ban the sale of cashews, peanuts, pecans to for those proud residents whose appetites match the size of their rides? How dare they discriminate against those protein-craving, pick-up truck driving, law abiding citizens? But slow down.
The Nutz in question here are the kind synonymous with that portion of male anatomy also known as balls, 'nads, cajones (especially in South Florida), the family jewels, or, if you're going to actually try to be mature about it, testicles. Exactly how these nuts ever ended up dangling from the stubby phallus otherwise known as a trailer hitch, is something of a mystery. But Truck Nutz have exploded on to the scene, so to speak, over the past few years. Driving around Jacksonville, I've spotted several pair, some chrome, some day-glow yellow, some camouflaged. Heck, there are even confederate-flag-printed Truck Nutz.
But the kill-joys at the Florida legislature, including State Senator Carey Baker, who introduced a bill outlawing the vehicular augmentation, seem poised to stamp out further scrotal representation. Ouch. If the bill passes the House, a wanton, public display of Truck Nutz would merit a $60 fine.
So are there enough 'nads out there on Florida's roads to put a dent into that budget gap? And will the ACLU step in to protect the rights of free-balling truck owners in the Sunshine State? Stay tuned for next week's episode of the wacky reality show that the rest of the country can't get enough of: "Florida!"
Recent Comments
(Page 1 of 3)suzanne9:56AMApr 28th 2008
Right on Katherine!!
I have had the pleasure?? of "seeing said nutz" on the vehicles in front of me driving down the lovely roads of Florida also... I thought it was comical.
But it's not comical that we are wasting valuable time & money trying to outlaw nutz??? (I can hear the response from the Hillary haters already)
I wish Carey Baker would get the "nads" to get my vote counted.
Carey Baker is a Republican isn't he?
Can't believe I am blogging about nutz's
Sorry for being so descriptive it just seemed suiting.
Only in Florida!!!
Suzanne
Clinton 08'
John10:46AMApr 28th 2008
Finally something we can agree on. By the way, for the older drivers in Florida: do their nutz drag on the pavement?
John in Philadelphia
OBAMA '08
Mary Parker10:56AMApr 28th 2008
I have seen them on 18 wheelers here in NC. They are soo gross!!! They dangle and swing with the bumps. They really do look like balls. But I have to admit I laugh when I see them. My son turns pink and goes into a giggle frenzy. I don't think it is any worse then some of the bumper stickers out there.
Get over it Florida! Get back to working on a re-vote.
Robert Morris11:44AMApr 28th 2008
So when is somebody going publish the email address and phone numbers of some of idiot politians who waste public money trying to get some recognition by catering to a sexually inhibited parent that can't say ,I don't know to a child.WHO cares?.GOD forbid he ever looks at a Stallion, a real bull , a male dog or even can use a urinal in a public rest room.
Please publish those addresses and phone numbers.
suzanne11:45AMApr 28th 2008
John
I don't think I want to know the answer to your question
I think our Florida Republicans have way toooo much time on their hands!!!
Suzanne
Clinton 08'
TJ11:59AMApr 28th 2008
FORGET THE NUTZ AND COUNT THE VOTZ.
CERTIFIED CITIZEN VOTZ MUST BE COUNTED
suzanne12:02PMApr 28th 2008
Robert Morris
Tallahassee Office
Senate Office Building
Room 308
404 South Monroe St
Tallahassee, Fl. 32399
carey@careybaker.us
850.487.5014
good luck!
so true this man was never raised around farm animals or horses was he?
Suzanne
baileys mom12:30PMApr 28th 2008
they are tacky, yes, but a law against them? golly, there are so many other issues today, must we waste time???? i don't like saggy pants on teen boys that show their under roos..., or thong showing super low riding jeans on teen girls either, but last i checked, the country doesn't revolve around what I like....lol. Lotsa people don't like my bunny-hugging ways, but i'm free to hug all the bunnies i want, so i say the truck drivers who wanna show us whats important to them.....well, i just won't look at them.
bill garrity1:23PMApr 28th 2008
Hooray! Let's find some more ridiculous issues to legislate while our economy and court system take a nose dive.
Kjd1:28PMApr 28th 2008
Balls and Boobs, will we ever get past them?
Michael Holbrook1:51PMApr 28th 2008
Lets stop the foolishness and work on things that matter like the budget. Stop crying over a few low hanging nutz dangling from the bumpers of trucks . Do your job or resign.
jim2:10PMApr 28th 2008
Let the fellows hang out ,how important is it
bonbon2:18PMApr 28th 2008
they must be nuts
sorry couldn't help it ! ! !
all I see is, it is just another way to bring in money.
and such a waste of time.
most guys think they are cool, mine included ! ! !
and I have seen boobies for rear view mirrors,
what's next
will we have to cover our pet's anatomy, when in public.
will lady's undie's have to be taken off the racks and hidden so litle boys cannot see.
at least this isn't negative about Hillary for a change
SMALL TOWN GIRL3:12PMApr 28th 2008
MORE OBAMA LIES!
Charlie Gibson told Obama: "In 1996, your campaign issued a questionnaire, and your writing was on the questionnaire that said you favored a ban on handguns."
Obama denied filling out the questionnaire. HE FREQUENTLY HAS AMNESIA!
Clinton adviser, Howard Wolfson, added: "Perhaps he could explain how his handwriting could appear on it without actually seeing it?" Wolfson added during a Thursday conference call with reporters.
On another issue, Obama’s excuse for William Ayers is he was only a young boy when Ayers bombed the U.S.
Why didn’t Obama tell the REST of the story?
In the 1990’s, Obama (AS AN ADULT) served on a board with Ayers, the Woods Foundation, which was a paid, “underline PAID”, directorship position. They worked together and attended fundraisers together. Ayers held fundraisers and was a contributor to Obama’s Chicago campaign, plus the Obamas and the Ayers visited each other quite often. ENOUGH SAID!
Obama’s associations with Wright, Ayers, Sinclair, Farrakhan, the Black Panthers, Rezko, Meeks, Malley, Auchi, Khalidi, McPeaks, Nadhmi, Said, and Michelle Obama, among others, deserve being vetted. What’s their fear? DON’T FORGET THESE PEOPLE.
BY THE WAY, WE HAVE 50 STATES --- NOT 48!
BE CAREFUL WHO YOU VOTE FOR!
CONCERNEDAMERICAN3:15PMApr 28th 2008
If Hillary has selective memory over ONE incident --- what does that say about Obama?
IN OVER A 20-YEAR PERIOD, he “never” heard Rev. Wright say anything that was not proper --- until he got caught --- them he remembered them, as well as the NAFTA meeting, bomber Ayers, Farrakhan, Rezko, Sinclair and many others.
His “amnesia” won’t wash anymore --- Because first he said he didn't, then he said he did, then he said he didn't, and I heard him yesterday say he did, now today he said he didn't. He would have left the church if he had heard it --- it would have been intolerable. Which is it?
Now that is not only selective memory --- but selective dumbness as well!
Hillary 2008!
EASTCOAST3:28PMApr 28th 2008
OBAMA REFUSES TO DEBATE IN INDIANA AND NC. HE HAS TO READ FROM A SCRIPTED SPEECH. HE IS A WIMP! NO WAY CAN HE LEAD OUR COUNTRY!
I VOTE FOR WHAT I KNOW.
I KNOW that America prospered during the Clinton Administration. Everyone was doing well, gas prices were low, stock market was good, no war, people could afford their homes, good life, we had a surplus...
I KNOW that Hillary is an intelligent, strong, resilient and powerful candidate who can stand up for America AND fight to defend us from our enemies.
I also KNOW that MUSLIMS and ANTI-AMERICAN RADICALS have never served our country and are against our Constitution, our Christian faith and our American way of life. I will never put a radical person who doesn't know who or what he is in our White House. Obama still has not explained himself.
GOD BLESS HILLARY
AND GOD BLESS AMERICA!
RURAL AMERICAN3:34PMApr 28th 2008
FINALLY, THE MEDIA IS TELLING THE TRUTH ABOUT OBAMA.
The media didn’t spill the truth about Obama until most of the primaries were done with. Many people felt lied to and I know many (now former) Bama supporters that are really upset they have been bamboozled. All of them have said if they knew then what they know now, they would never have voted for him. I IMAGINE MANY OF THE PEOPLE WHO HAVE ALREADY VOTED WOULD LIKE ANOTHER CHANCE!
When Senator Obama (or surrogates like Pastor Wright) say something ‘dim’ — “it was taken out of context”, according to the biased media.
When a Clinton or McCain (or a supporter) says something ‘dim’ — “they are selfish, evil or a multitude of other insults”, according to the biased media.
Many Obama supporters seem to be such enablers, excusing everything as his being “truthful.” HIS ENTIRE CAMPAIGN HAS BEEN BASED ON LIES, EXCUSES AND DAMAGE CONTROL!
Somehow, I don’t see him truly relating to the rural people of Indiana OR North Carolinians, considering his 20-year relationship with radical Jeremiah Wright, and his ties to anti-Americans Rezko, bomber Ayers, Farrakhan and other shady characters.
SAY NO TO OBAMA!
I PRAY FOR HILLARY / EDWARDS 2008!
Larry3:37PMApr 28th 2008
In the words of 'Uncle Jeramiah'...
Barack HUSSEIN Obama, Barack HUSSEIN Obama, Barack HUSSEIN Obama....Guess we have his 'BLESSINGS' to speak that SCARY middle name, now....
No Barack Hussein Obama in OUR White House...And, no
'It's a MEAN country...That I am PROUD of for the first time, in my adult LIFETIME....Michelle Obama' !
PROUDAMERICAN3:53PMApr 28th 2008
Sorry Obama supporters...I firmly believe you are making a MAJOR mistake.
I would never consider voting for a man who did not stand up for America in his church, or to a hate spewing, America damning, so-called "spiritual” mentor-"pastor".
If Obama could not stand up for America there, in his church, with that man, I do not expect him to stand up for America when it counts!!!
HILLARY 2008!
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Katherine9:42AMApr 28th 2008
Are you serious? Florida courts are more concerned about truck balls than counting votes toward the democratic nomination?
Thanks for exposing truck nuts to me. I hadn't known before this. Now I feel cultured.