Ralph Nader

There's a new candidate for president chanting "Den-ver! Den-ver!" Independent presidential candidate and, some say, Al Gore spoiler Ralph Nader has a bone to pick with the DNC's heir apparent, Barack Obama, and plans to take them to task at August's Democratic National Convention. From The Rocky Mountain News:

"He wants to show that he is not a threatening . . . another politically threatening African-American politician," Nader said. "He wants to appeal to white guilt. You appeal to white guilt not by coming on as black is beautiful, black is powerful. Basically he's coming on as someone who is not going to threaten the white power structure, whether it's corporate or whether it's simply oligarchic. And they love it. Whites just eat it up."

Earlier in the interview, he asks why Obama isn't pressing certain issues, saying, "Is it because he wants to talk white? He doesn't want to appear like Jesse Jackson?

The interviewer asked him to clarify that he was saying that Obama does try to "talk white," and Nader's reply was, "Of course."

The interweb is abuzz with headlines of the "gaffe" (is this really going to hurt Nader's chances?), so I thought I would give the Nader campaign a call and see what they had to say for themselves. A lot, it turns out.

How long has this campaign dragged on? It will be two years old in November, and there's no reason to believe it will stop then.

At this point, it's incredible to consider that some people haven't made up their minds. It's incredible that Hillary is still drunkenly running for president of Earth, that Smooth Barry Obama has won the nomination but has to continue campaigning for it, that a senile old fraud like John McCain is the nominee of any major party, that delusional attention whore Ralph Nader is running again, that an anti-libertarian hack like Bob Barr is the libertarian nominee, and that the libertarian candidate (Ron Paul) is sitting out the race despite amassing a fortune in campaign contributions and a delirious following.

But what's most incredible, to me, as a person who writes about this garbage for a living, is that it doesn't matter at all what I write about, because the comments will be an insane half-literate string of racist nonsense and startling ignorance that has nothing to do with the subject of this post.

Democratic leadership may be asking Hillary Clinton to quit, but not everyone is. Ralph Nader, in particular, wants her to keep going. In fact, he feels so strongly that she continue her campaign that he has, well, written a poem. And it goes a little something like this:

"Don't listen to people when they tell you not to run anymore
That's just political bigotry
Listen to your own inner citizen First Amendment voice
This is America
Just like every other citizen, you have a right to run
Whenever you like
For as long as you like
It's up to you, Hillary
Just tell them
It's democracy
Get used to it."

Now, it's a standard rule here at Political Machine to avoid any commentary on the literary arts. Even when Millie Bush is the author. Nevertheless we feel that this poem--while breaking free from the traditional shackles of rhyme, metaphor and references to booze--falls slightly short of the slam-dunk necessary to keep a sinking campaign afloat. For what it's worth, our editorial team has come up with some additional poetic tributes, and we invite you to share your own in the comments section below.

Politico had it first: On his web site today, Ralph Nader has a little advice for Hillary Clinton.

Senator Clinton: Just read where Senator Patrick Leahy is calling on you to drop out of the Presidential race. Believe me. I know something about this.

Here's my advice: Don't listen to people when they tell you not to run anymore. That's just political bigotry. Listen to your own inner citizen First Amendment voice. This is America. Just like every other citizen, you have a right to run. Whenever you like. For as long as you like.

It's up to you, Hillary. Just tell them – It's democracy. Get used to it. Yours truly, Ralph Nader

More evidence that politics makes strange bedfellows. If Hillary's lucky, maybe Nader will consider her for a cabinet position.

The Associated Press is reporting that Michigan Republican Joe Knollenberg now has a formidable opponent for his Congressional seat:

Assisted suicide advocate Jack Kevorkian plans to run for Congress, complicating a Michigan race that is expected to be among the most competitive in the nation.

The so-called "Dr. Death," who was released from prison last year and remains on parole, will run as a candidate with no party affiliation for a congressional seat representing Detroit's suburbs, an associate said.

Knollenberg, you may remember, is the one whose chief of staff melted down on a Young Turks listener a few months back. See the video after the jump.

This is an odd career choice for Kevorkian, who seems much better suited to join Hillary Clinton's team of campaign advisers. Perhaps at this point, he feels they don't need the help.

When reached for comment, my Doctor, after his customary admonition to take a cold shower and think about baseball, saw Kevorkian's role in the campaign as that of a noble spoiler, comparing him to Ralph Nader. Now, there's an interesting ticket.

I don't mean to be so damn YouTube happy today, but thanks to The Young Turks, I discovered yet another gem this afternoon.

Behold! A Message to Ralph Nader by I'm Some Dude You've Never Heard Of, a political spoof of the Message to Scientology video. The latter viral video after the jump.

My favorite part of the Nader vid: "You have a lot to be proud of, but regarding the campaign, here are your laurels. Why don't you lie down on them? And take a g-damn nap for once."

It's a shame Mike Bloomberg has decided against running for president. He's a smart guy and would be a strong candidate. I'm still holding out hope that Ron Paul will throw his hat in as an independent, or maybe as a Libertarian.

And I'm thrilled that the much-maligned Ralph Nader announced he'll be around making a stink for the next eight months. (I'm not one of those weenies who blame Nader for the woeful Bush administration. They are too cowardly to admit that Al Gore ran a crappy race in '00 and probably didn't deserve to be president.)

Here's hoping the Natural Law Party and the Marijuana Party and the Greens and the Whigs all run somebody for the White House too. We need more presidential choices, not fewer. Obviously all third party candidates are looooong shots, to say the least. But winning isn't the only point. The idea of this democracy is to find the candidate that best represents my views and positions. What are the odds that person is always either a Republican or Democrat?

OK, clearly this post's title will have some screeching. But hear me out. Aside from intolerant types who believe there ought to be fewer choices on the ballot and not more, there are plenty of positives to be had by letting Ralph Nader run for president.

He'll be a voice for a whole host of leftists who have been represented by Barack Obama's voting record, but who for the duration of this campaign, will be abandoned.

Nader's presence in the race, while raising embarrassing issues on Obama's left-flank, will serve as liberal ringer, allowing Obama to continue his moderate presentation. The wing's of both party's spectrum are less populated than the hunky middle.

Unlike McCain's flank, which may grow restless throughout this long general election Obama's wingnuts can chortle, organize and be cared for by the prodding of Nader.

On MSNBC's Meet the Press this morning, Ralph Nader announced that he is running for President again this year. He did not announce a running mate, but is said to have winnowed the field to tow choices, Yakov Smirnov and That-Thing-in-the Back-of-Your-Throat-That-Looks-Like-a-Punching-Bag. The trio are said to be ironing out policy differences.

In all seriousness, though, I've never been one of those leeberals who got angry with Nader and blamed him for Al Gore's defeat in 2000. Last time I checked, Nader isn't on the Supreme Court, didn't purge hundreds of thousands of Democrats from Florida and Ohio voter rolls, and did not roll over and surrender on recounts. I love Al Gore the filmmaker, but Al Gore the candidate ran an awful campaign, still won, then refused to claim his victory. After the jump, some more clips from Meet the Press, and some brief analysis that goes something like this: Nader is absolutely right.

Here's the announcement: